Treasures of Darkness

Safe Pasture

2012-01-24T06:00:00.000-06:00

The wind howls outside and I sleep late enjoying the rain on the roof. Sensitive son in the next room is awaked by the sound of horse hooves on pavement. He looks out the window in time to see our four mischievous horses running across the road. This is the fourth, maybe fifth time they have escaped since Christmas.

I pull of rubber farm boots and rush out the door not even considering the fact that I am still in pajamas. I manage to get out the door in time to direct the pony back up the drive to our pasture. The other three animals follow his lead. Neighbor, who takes her dogs our at this time of the morning, catches me with her words, “Looks like someone has learned how to open the gate.”

Sensitive son and I run after horses pushing them up to the pasture. I am frustrated and weary trying to keep these animals penned safely where they belong. I double chain the gate and put a log where hopefully they cannot push the gate open. I don’t want an accident to occur because these animals are roaming from their pasture.

With horses penned in, I hope, we feed animals and then head back to the house. As I sit with my Bible and coffee I think about neighbor’s comment, “Looks like someone has learned how to open the gate.” I think about temptation, how the flesh desires or the enemy seeks to open the gate and draw me away from the safety of the Father’s pasture. The more I yield the easier it becomes to open the gate, wandering away from the safety of the Father’s field.

Father God, he patiently, lovingly, comes looking for me. His kindness leads me to repentance as He leads me back to safe pasture. He leads me to obey His commands in order to create a safe pasture.

Trust in the LORD and do good;
dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
Delight yourself in the LORD
and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:3-4

Scripture Only Sunday

2012-01-22T06:00:00.000-06:00

“[Trials and Temptations] Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance.” James 1:2-3 NIV

Puzzle Pieces

2012-01-19T06:00:00.000-06:00

I should be writing, something. It is a school holiday so we take a break. I read and walk the hill to watch Precious husband and boys work on putting porch roof back in place. Rain delays have held the work up. Precious husband says that putting the pieces back in place is like working on a giant puzzle – finding the right spot has held the work up.

Truthfully I haven’t felt much like writing. Since the end of the year named consumed and the beginning of the year named reflect I just feel quiet. It seems I am waiting for pieces of my life puzzle to be put in position before I can move forward. It seems this is an in-between time - between all the turmoil of the last six months and what comes next.

I listen to this…

I read Ann… and continue counting…taking a daily joy dare. Looking for the joy in the moments – whether good or ugly. The One who created this puzzle of a life I am living – He sees the finished work. So I rest and trust in the goodness of God and give thanks in everything.

“give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:18

Scripture Only Sunday

2012-01-15T06:00:00.001-06:00

You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.”
Psalm 16:11

Teaching Treasures

2012-01-12T06:00:00.001-06:00

It is Monday morning and the school books beckon us to begin again. Fun son caught the bus at 7:00. I sit and plan out the lessons for the week while two youngest prepare breakfast. After our sausage balls and scrambled eggs, spelling manuals are pulled out.

Sensitive son just has time to finish before Precious husband arrives home from the fire station. The two of them pull on work boots and take the truck up the hill to the house project. Today they will work on the roof for the front porch.

While Princess daughter and I make sure decimals are lined up properly the two men make sure posts and beams line up correctly. When all is aligned nails and spikes are driven in, securing the roof to the decking.

Hopefully by the end of the day all the post and beams will be in place. This evening as Princess daughter cooks chili for dinner Sensitive son will take his turn lining up decimals. Tomorrow, if the weather allows, the roof of the porch will go back in place.

Full of Holes

2012-01-10T06:00:00.001-06:00

We have just hit the two year mark on this house project. Many of the setbacks have been beyond our control, like waiting to find a house mover, waiting on house mover for over four months to get all the parts on the property. Some of the waiting has been time to work around Precious husband’s paying work schedule. Some of the waiting is having finances available for the next step.

A January day dawns gorgeous, a warm 60 degrees, with a open blue sky. My eyes are full of blue things. Precious husband and Sensitive son work on putting the decking for the front porch in place. We all work on moving boards out of the shed, onto the trailer, making them more accessible to the house.

I walk around inside snapping pictures. When the project is complete I want to remember this mess. There are half walls, holes in the ceiling where the crane separated top floor from the bottom, electrical wires hanging in random places, boards stacked everywhere, tarps hanging across doors, a hole for stairs leading to the basement, and the fireplace is covered with plywood to keep the stone from falling.

I reflect, life, it can be a mess. My insides churn sometimes in the waiting and the brokenness. I’m waiting for children to get their act together, waiting for me to do the same, waiting for us to be put together. We are full of holes that only Jesus can fill. I don’t want to remember this mess – I want wholeness.

We sit on the front porch with its temporary posts. In front of me I see the moon rising into an ever deepening blue sky. Peering around the end of the porch I can see the sun setting giving the clouds a rose color. I long for some rose colored glasses of my own.

But I think God wants me to remember this mess. So that today I can have faith that the Father has a plan and is leading us in the way we should go. So in the future I can reflect, seeing all that He has done and praise Him for the strength and ability to get where He is taking us.

“For the Lord your God is bringing you into a good land…When you have eaten and are satisfied, praise the Lord your God for the good land he has given you. Be careful that you do not forget the Lord your God,…” Deuteronomy 8: 7, 10-11a

Scripture Only Sunday

2012-01-08T06:00:00.000-06:00

“Wash and perfume yourself, and put on your best clothes.
Then go down to the threshing floor,…
When he lies down go and uncover his feet and lie down.
He will tell you what to do.” Ruth 3:3-4

Filling the Weeks

2012-01-05T18:00:00.000-06:00

The end of 2011 and beginning of 2012 are busy days. We fill the days with a gingerbread house tradition for Princess daughter’s birthday, a new pet, grandson’s first birthday, developing relationships at new fellowship, and practicing our painting skills.

The air turns cold, a chilly 25 degrees. Fun son spends his days cutting firewood for the wood burning stove. He also spends a time at our local zoo volunteering 55 hours in four days. This will keep his volunteer status active through the end of the school year.

Animals become escape artists as goats free themselves from their pens and horses escape the pasture. We spend a breathless few hours on several days rounding them up and securing enclosures.

We hang out at Gold-hearted mom’s for several days before she gets on a plane headed west for vacation with her sister and brother-in-law.

Precious husband and two boys work on our house project. Porches and decks are moved into place, readied to go back on the house. I climb a ladder into the house, walk up a flight of stairs into what will one day be our bedroom. Once there I gaze out the window across the winter pasture. The wind is a gusty 20 mph and the tarps flap against the side of the house. I can image it finished.

We fill the holiday weeks with activities we all enjoy and the time passes quickly. Fun son heads back to school today and next week two youngest and I will get started with a new semester. Darling daughter and dear son-in-love continue to build relationships with their international friends while raising Little One. In February Challenge son will begin firefighter rookie school. Helpful son continues working while struggling to figure out what comes next in his life.

The new year rushes at me. I take it all in and savor the moments as they come. I want to be wise like Mary, treasuring and pondering all these things.

Scripture Only Sunday

2012-01-01T06:00:00.001-06:00

Moon Gazing

2011-12-31T06:00:00.001-06:00

My moon photos don't turn out nearly as good as hers.

I have been moon gazing, enjoying the full moon over the pasture. We have had goats separated into four different pens. Three sets of does and bucks together and one small doe alone surrounded by ducks and chickens. The night is going to be cold and there is a frost warning. Concern for the smallest doe pushes me from the warm house to move goats together for heat. In the dark the moon gives light to see the way.

~~~~

It is early on a Saturday morning and I am driving Precious Husband to work. His truck is in the shop, again. The sun is just beginning to peak over the horizon and the moon remains in the sky. The brighter the sun becomes the more faint the moon, giving way to the greater light.

~~~~

Sunday morning comes, voices and hands are lifted in worship when images and words play through my soul. Images of fire, a cross, a tree play on the screen in the front of my mind while in the background an image of the moon and the bronze laver wait their turn.

Wrapped in the lesson “Consume” and the image of fire for 2011 has been the phrase “See God”. The Father ties the naming of the years together. I pick up paint brush and slowly try to put the worship image on canvas. Now is when I wish I were an artist. But the strokes flow and the image comes to the front.

Find 2009, God delights in being found and He is one who is hidden in plain sight … I have been stained by His Grace and Glory 2010 and His blood has made me whiter than snow … The drive to see God as I search daily for eternity and the word Consume 2011 has left its fiery zeal in my heart.

~~~~

Earlier this year I took words from Ann’s book and wrote them in a way to remember the lesson …

moon face glows
all beauty a reflection
fierce beauty
flaming fire
burns through masks
leaves soul disrobed
moon has my gaze
all eye
all blinded by glory

When I get home I turn the pages eager to reread the chapter where she chases the moon. I smile when I read the title, “What Do You Want? The Place of Seeing God”. God’s consuming work has done its work as I am learning to walk in the place to See God.

The image of the moon and the bronze laver now take their turn at the front of my mind. The Father names the new year 2012– “Reflect”. The moon, the bronze laver, they are both vessels that reflect another’s radiance. Two verses rise to the front as I meditate on the moon, the laver, and the Word…

“And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” 2 Corinthians 3:18

“But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us.” 2 Corinthians 4:7

…and I wait to See God in a new year, in a new way.

If at first you don’t succeed…

2011-12-29T06:00:00.000-06:00

Wayyy back here I committed to memorize Colossians this year. Princess daughter and I have worked over these last months, slowly adding lines. She is sidetracked with Wednesday night memorization. I am sidetracked by a poor memory.

Chapter one plants itself but the words for the next three chapters just won’t stick. So I gather the Word, the printed two verses a week, printout memorization aids, and a cup of coffee and I read out loud. I close my eyes and recite the words. Peeking at the pages, I check my progress, the words just won’t stay in my brain.

So I will continue – daily beginning again - for if at first I don’t succeed – I am committed and will press on for the prize. This reciting, it is a habit worth the effort.

“Committing the Holy to heart is the way we commune with the Holy Himself.” Ann Voskamp

Consumed

2011-12-27T06:00:00.002-06:00

I looked it up the minute I heard God speak the word into my spirit – consume.   The first definition here is “to destroy or expend by use; use up” and the last is “to absorb, engross”.   Here I stand at the end of the year and deep down I feel the first definition – expended – empty. So many transitions and setbacks this year, too many changes.

The two oldest sons struggle to find their places in the world. Challenge son moves into a local fire department for a training/live-in program. We battle through his car accident the results of which at the end of the year leave me feeling cheated by the system. I stand grateful that no one was physically injured. Unfortunately I wonder where God is in the situation when emotionally and financially it takes such a toll.

Helpful son stays with Gold-hearted mom when we move in May to the farm. On the one hand he feels abandoned and on the other he won’t follow the few rules he has been given. Simple things like calling when you get home from work, not being out late, and keeping the yard and house in order. Communication is not our strong suit at this time and we constantly are at odds.   Still struggling.

I pray they make decisions that honor God. I strive to let go and let God work in their lives, trusting Him for the outcome, even as I seek to see Him in these confusing places.
This mom2six is now down to three children living at home.

During the spring and summer we attempt a garden. As the summer rolls along Precious husband asks what I have learned from this years gardening experience. I tell him we need a better fence around the garden as the deer and other woodland creatures consume every ear of corn and most of the cantaloupes and watermelons.   It resembles my life, I plant seeds, they are consumed by situations I have no control over.   I long for a harvest that doesn’t quite come to completion.

It is during this time that the Father and I begin a desert journey. Even though I feel dry, God walks with me here. I look to Him to fill me in this dusty place.

The time rolls around for this homeschooling family to begin a new school year. We start with three students but at the beginning of the second nine weeks God asks me to let go of another. It takes a week to get Fun son registered for public school.   I release him to develop a life for himself – his grades, his reputation – they belong to him. He has to make the choices. I pray he makes decisions that honor God.

This mom2six is now down to two children filling my days.

Then it comes, a situation arises that topples me, send me headlong into a pit. It is a small thing, but for some reason it seems huge. There is a problem with this little farmhouse we have been living in and we may have to move – again. Twice in one year – just when we are beginning to feel a little settled. It seems God has led to a wonderful place of worship, Fun son is settled in nicely at school, darling daughter’s animals are situated in stalls, chicken coop is done, house project is finally all on the property ready for us to slowly reassemble.

As the daily burdens of raising children are reduced the emotional burdens seem greater.   The laying down and letting go is harder that I thought. God where are you?   All year I have just wanted to be consumed with you – your presence – to see you. I have reached the end of the year and only feel expended – empty.

It is at this alter I hear Him whisper. The work of being consumed has done its work. It has created a place in my heart where I can see Him, hear him for the next part of our journey. It is here the Father speaks the name for 2012. My heart burns, expectations are consumed, together we prepare to move into a new year.
____________________________________________
Results about our housing issue come in hours after I pen this post. Praising God that we will not have to move – again.   I breathe deeply and exhale, tears of gratitude roll down my cheeks.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-12-25T06:00:00.001-06:00

“…in these last days he has spoken to us by his Son, whom he appointed heir of all things, and through whom he made the universe…

“…about the Son he says,

“Your throne, O God, will last for ever and every,
and righteousness will be the scepter of your kingdom.
You have loved righteousness and hated wickedness;
therefore God, your God, has set you above your companions
by anointing you with the oil of joy.”

Hebrews 1:2, 8-9

Christmas blessings to you and those you love!

_________________________

Google Image

A-Z Gratitude List

2011-12-22T06:00:00.001-06:00

The year winds to an end and I have time to spend time reflecting. It has been a while since I have listed here the blessings God has given. I flip through the pages of my journal and there is the evidence of a life filled with the goodness of God. There have been difficult parts of the journey, days that have broken this heart and brought tears pouring down my cheeks. But today I choose to focus on the joys Jesus gives along the way…

Father in heaven, I am overflowing with thankfulness for…

A’s insight
Advent
Baking cookies
Bible Study
Beach
Birthday parties
Boxes of apples and oranges
CALG
Catching up with extended family
Challenge son
Christian comedians, laughing with fellow believers
Christmas cards
Darling daughter
Dear son-in-love
Encouragement of believers
Eggs
Firepit in the pasture
Fun son
Grandson
Gold-hearted mom
Golden retriever –Lady
H’s hugs and texts
Helpful son
Indoor swimming pools
Jesus, Jesus, Jesus
K’s friendship
Ladies Bible study
Life Group
Long distance phone calls
Lunch with friends I haven’t seen in months
M graduating from Lovelady Center and getting a job
M&M’s hospitality
Mittens on cold mornings
New artwork
Open skies
Oreo truffles
Parades
Precious husband
Princess daughter
Quart jars of homemade applesauce
Rose-colored sunsets
School breaks
Sensitive son
Studying student
Sunday afternoons spent with friends
Teamwork
Umbrellas
Vast views of God’s creation
Veterans – those who serve our nation with honor
Waterfall in M&M’s backyard
Waterproofed basement
Xylo¹
Yellow flowers
Zumba class
^{________________________________________________________}¹ This one requires an explanation. I searched my dictionary and it says xylo is wood. I am grateful for all the wood the men around here have chopped to use in the wood burning stove which heats the house.

Near of Kin

2011-12-20T06:00:00.000-06:00

It is the Christmas season and we study the book of Ruth. All through the story I see the reason for the season. The depth of God’s love is written in every line. For just like Naomi and Ruth I need a kinsman-redeemer.

In the study Kelly Minter highlights three aspects of the kinsman-redeemer…

they must be near of kin
they must be able to redeem
they must be willing to redeem.

On Sunday I share lunch with a friend and afterwards we talk about how Jesus took on humanity. How in order for us to be delivered from sin God had to send someone who was fully human, not just fully God. How does God become human? We marvel at the love, the power, the mercy of God that is beyond our understanding.

On Monday I think how in a manger lies a baby who will grow and become my kinsman-redeemer. I read Kelly’s words and they jump off the page for me…“we were given a Redeemer who left heaven and was made like one of us in human flesh because we needed a Savior who was near of kin.”¹

Kelly encourages to read Hebrews 2:14 and I can’t just stop reading there. I read to the end of the chapter. The miracle of Christmas is written in these words as well.

“Since the children have flesh and blood he too shared in their humanity so that by his death he might destroy him who holds the power of death – the devil – and free those who all their lives were held in slavery to the fear of death…..For this reason he had to be made like his brothers in every way, in order that he might be made a merciful and faithful high priest in service to God, and that he might make atonement for the sins of the people.” Hebrews 2:14-15, 17

From the legacy of Ruth and Boaz came The One who by becoming a baby, taking on flesh and blood, became like me in every way. Jesus became my near of kin. His coming, his life, showed that Jesus was willing to redeem. Jesus death and resurrection proved that he was able to redeem.

Father, thank you for a Redeemer who is like me and yet unlike me. Jesus I am grateful that you came and accomplished for me everything that I was powerless to do on my own. Spirit of God, help me to always have a willing heart to serve you.

______________________________

¹ Ruth: Loss, Love, & Legacy, Kelly Minter, p. 125

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-12-18T06:00:00.000-06:00

“So Boaz said the Ruth, “My daughter, listen to me. Don’t go and glean in another field and don’t go away from here. Stay here with my servant girls….And whenever you are thirsty, go and get a drink from the water jars the men have filled.” Ruth 2:8-9

Hear Him Whisper

2011-12-13T06:00:00.000-06:00

How often I am unaware of God’s presence. He is always with me, even when situations push me into a pit of disappointment. The circumstance drags over three months and finally comes to a hearing. The outcome is not to our benefit. I take a plunge into this pit – again. Dealing with disappointment and a God who seems distant.

“In my alarm I said, “I am cut off from your sight!” Yet you heard my cry for mercy when I called to you for help.” Psalm 31:22

The Lord spoke the word consume at the beginning of 2011. I have sought to let the Lord consume my moments, seeking to see His hand in every situation. Here at the end of the year I have hit a familiar wall, a disappointment that blinds my eyes – leaves me feeling that I am cut off from His sight.

The Spirit of God comes alongside – the Counselor brings help just when I am weak and needy. He sends help in the form of Wednesday night Bible study, Ruth: Loss, Love, & Legacy and Looking Up.

“When you walk through the dark, these things [God’s divine hand] can seem mysterious and God distant.” ¹

“God calls to know Him. Calls to trust Him…People prone to wander, prone to bruising, prone to doubting, prone to losing.” ²

I am so prone to wander and doubt when disappointments come my way. I cry out to the Lord for faith and a focus fixed on Jesus. Disappointments in life will come and be many. Will I cling to the disappointment or faith in the Father?

God whispers…Have Faith

Cling to Jesus no matter how dark and disappointing
Cling to Jesus no matter how long and laborious
Cling to Jesus for dear life and never let go
God is with me….

“For God who said, “Let light shine out of darkness,” made his light shine in our hearts to give us the light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.

But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all surpassing power is from God and not from us.” 2 Corinthians 4:6-7

God whispers…Have Faith

His light shines into and out of my darkened heart
His glory revealed in the face of Jesus Christ
His treasure reflected in a plain jar of clay
His mystery displayed in all surpassing power from God
not from me – but in me
God is with me.

God whispers…Have Faith

___________________________________________

¹ Ruth: Loss, Love, & Legacy, Kelly Minter

² Looking Up, Beth Moore

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-12-11T06:00:00.000-06:00

“Just then Boaz arrived from Bethlehem

and greeted the harvesters,

“The Lord be with you!”

“The Lord bless you!” they called back.”

Ruth 2:4

Teaching Treasures

2011-12-08T12:20:00.001-06:00

We are down to the last few days before the holiday break. Our mornings start a little later as we give the sun time to warm up a bit before feeding our menagerie of animals.
After the animals are cared for we finish up a Math section on fractions and organize a school newspaper for English. Literature has us reading “A Christmas Carol” while in Science we learn about plant cells. We round out our days with History studying ancient Greece.
We spend one afternoon at Gold-hearted mom’s house baking cookies. The evenings become quiet times of reflection as we take a Jesse Tree Journey. The Word keeps our hearts warm as we stay close to the wood burning stove, it keeps the house cozy.

God With Us...

2011-12-06T06:00:00.001-06:00

The Thanksgiving meal has been enjoyed and the children sent home with Darling daughter and Dear son-in-love to help them move over the weekend. I spend the evening rereading and preparing for Advent. I print, cut-out, glue, and tie knots getting the Jesse Tree tags ready.

Wednesday night ladies Bible study has been on the book of Ruth. I’ve read the words from the book of Ruth, as well as the study author¹, and with new eyes have felt drawn to the King's Table during the time of Thanksgiving. Now as Advent begins I read the words of Boaz with fresh eyes.

The first words Boaz speaks rings through history, which is only fitting as Boaz becomes an ancestor for the the Messiah,

“The Lord be with you!”.

His words continue to ring as God gives Isaiah a prophecy and later an angel of the Lord appears to Joseph and confirms, “All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin will be child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him

Immanuel – which means “God with us.”

Should we ever have cause to doubt or lose hope, Jesus gives comfort of His presence before He returns to heaven, “And surely

I am with you always,

to the very end of the age.”

We light the candles, hang the ornaments, and read the words of Advent – anticipating the celebration of Jesus first coming. My mind is stuck on the coming of Boaz who foreshadowed the coming of The Redeemer. The first coming of Jesus that brought redemption through His blood. My mind is remains with the fact that He is with me, He will always be with me.
These words persist and lead me to Jesus second coming and John’s vision as written in the book of Revelation - which is drawing to a close in chapter 21. “From the throne a loud voice says,

“Now the dwelling of God is with men and

he will live with them.

They will be his people, and

God himself will be with them

and be their God.”

_________________________________
¹ Ruth: loss, love, & legacy by Kelly Minter
Photo of our Jesse Tree. I have been using A Jesus Advent Celebration; Jesse Tree Journey by Ann Voskamp.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-12-04T06:00:00.000-06:00

“Now Naomi had a relative on her husband’s side, from the clan of Elimelech, a man of standing, whose name was Boaz.” Ruth 2:1

Family Traditions

2011-11-29T06:00:00.000-06:00

Precious husband and Challenge son spend the day working at the fire station. For Precious husband this has become a regular routine, a family tradition, that he works the holidays. We have spent many holidays sharing a meal with the firefighters on duty and their families.

This year the rest of us gather and celebrate Thanksgiving a bit differently. Darling daughter and dear son-in-love have had the opportunity to meet several international students recently. Most of them are college students here in the States to further their education. A few have been here for less than a year.

We have the privilege of sharing Thanksgiving dinner with these new friends. Everyone enjoys the traditional turkey along with sweet potato casserole, cornbread dressing, and the other usual trimmings. We listen intently as the conversation flows and we overcome the language barrier.

We discuss cultural differences as well as those things we have in common. We focus on the things we have in common. Things such as families gathering and generations preparing and sharing a meal together. They will miss those things in the upcoming year as they are far from home.

I am thankful to have had the opportunity to have these kind people in our home. I think we may have found a new family tradition. Opening our home to celebrate with those who are far from home.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-11-27T06:00:00.000-06:00

“So she went out and began to glean in the fields behind the harvesters. As it turned out, she found herself working in a field belonging to Boaz, who was from the clan of Elimelech.” Ruth 2:3

The King’s Table

2011-11-22T06:00:00.000-06:00

Thanksgiving week dawns and through a study from the book of Ruth I take a new look at giving thanks.

“At mealtime Boaz said to Ruth, Come over here. Have some bread and dip it in the wine vinegar. When she sat down with the harvesters, he offered her some roasted grain. She at all she wanted and had some left over.” Ruth 2:14

Ruth, a foreigner in Israel and from Moab a country considered enemies by the Israelites, is invited by one of the prominent men in Bethlehem to join in a meal.

“David asked, “Is there any one left of the house of Saul to whom I can show kindness for Jonathan’s sake?…Mephibosheth!…Don’t be afraid, for I will surely show you kindness for the sake of your father, Jonathan. I will restore to you all the land…and you will always eat at the king’s table…and he was crippled in both feet.” excerpts from 2 Samuel 9

Mephibosheth, one crippled in both feet, is invited to eat at the king’s table based on the favor the king has for another.

“Only when the forces of power and kindness come together will we be in a position to eat from the king’s table.” ¹

“Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and be glad and give Him glory! For the wedding of the Lamb has come and His bride has made herself ready. Fine linen, bright and clean was given to her to wear…Blessed are those invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb” Revelation 19:6b-9

“Though we are unworthy, we are invited to God’s table because of Christ’s kindness and authority. …Like Mephibosheth, we are crippled in both feet, like Ruth, we bear the stain of Moab. …today is the day to be clothed in Christ’s righteousness.” ²

Red and blue make purple, red and orange make yellow,
How is it red of my sin and red of Christ’s blood
Turns my spirit garments white?
Only clothed in Christ’s righteousness
Fine linen, clean and bright,
God’s power and kindness come together
At the King’s table invites forever to dine

Most of us gather around the table at my mother’s, Precious husband and Challenge son spend the day at the fire station, and we give thanks. I close my eyes and imagine us all, one day, seated at the King’s table because of the kindness and authority of the Lamb. I treasure these thoughts in my heart and with a truly grateful heart I say…

May your Thanksgiving be blessed and may you accept the invitation to sit at the King’s table for all eternity.

_____________________________________________

¹ Ruth, Kelly Minter, P. 76

² Ruth, Kelly Minter, P.78

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-11-20T06:00:00.000-06:00

“I went away full, but the Lord has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi? The Lord has afflicted me; the Almighty has brought misfortune upon me.” Ruth 1:21

Teaching Treasures

2011-11-17T06:00:00.000-06:00

We take a break from books to attend a local Veteran’s Day parade and join with others to honor those who serve our nation.

Thank you and your families for your service and sacrifice!

Seeing Past the Crack

2011-11-15T06:00:00.000-06:00

The windshield on the van is broken. It has been broken for quite a while now. While driving in heavy fog recently the only thing I could see was the crack in the windshield. No matter how hard I tried to focus on the road, which was difficult enough with all the fog, the broken windshield became the focus.

Life seems to follow this pattern as well. When things are difficult and the road ahead is hard to see or understand, the focus becomes everything that is wrong. It is easy to lose sight of anything beyond the crack and the fog.

“But sin has so clouded the lenses of our hearts that we cannot see that other reality, the City of God, shining around us. … The visible becomes the enemy of the invisible; the temporal, of the eternal.” ¹

Later the same day I crested a hill and the view below is clear. No longer am I drawn to the crack, just the scenery. I took in the hills covered with multi-colored trees and the pale blue sky. The crack seemed to fade away as I focused on the beauty ahead.

“God and the spiritual world are real. We can reckon upon them with as much assurance as we reckon upon the familiar world around us. Spiritual things are there (or rather we should say here) inviting our attention and challenging our trust.” ¹

When life is flowing smoothly the beauty is obvious. It becomes easy to focus on the blessings of each day. Just as the fog lifts, my spirit rises and feels free to enjoy life.

“For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. So we fix our eyes not on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” 2 Corinthians 4:17-18

The fact that there was more fog ahead did not escape notice. I thought back to a text from a friend to the effect, have you ever noticed how the fog magnifies the light? Everything in the circle of light becomes clear.

“…we must break the evil habit of ignoring the spiritual. We must shift our interest from the seen to the unseen. For the great unseen Reality is God.” ¹

Whatever comes I must look past the crack. Seeing the light magnified in the fog and living free focusing on the beauty and blessings. There is far more to life – there is eternity to keep before me – and eternity is lived today.

“O God, quicken to life every power within me, that I may lay hold on eternal things. Open my eyes that I may see; give me acute spiritual perception; enable me to taste Thee and know that Thou art good. Make heaven more real to me than any earthly thing has ever been. Amen.” ²

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¹ Tozer, A. W. (Aiden Wilson) (2011-03-24). The Pursuit of God (p. 33-34). Kindle Edition.

² Tozer, A. W. (Aiden Wilson) (2011-03-24). The Pursuit of God (p. 35). Kindle Edition.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-11-13T06:00:00.000-06:00

“So the two women went on until they came to Bethlehem. When they arrived in Bethlehem, the whole town was stirred because of them, and the women exclaimed, “Can this be Naomi?” Ruth 1:19

Teaching Treasures

2011-11-10T06:00:00.000-06:00

This has been a hectic few days on the farm. Schooling this week has included biology. It is time to mate our three goat couples. Ma and Pa Goat were bred last fall and we kept the one kid. The other two does are getting new mates this year. We look forward to kids in the spring.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-11-06T05:00:00.000-06:00

“But Ruth replied, Don’t urge me to leave you or to turn back from you. Where you go I will go, and where you stay I will stay. Your people will be my people and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there I will be buried. May the Lord deal with me, be it ever so severely, if anything but death separates you and me.” Ruth 1:16-17

31 Days–Week 4 and a few days extra

2011-11-05T06:00:00.000-05:00

We have partnered together to pray for one another for the last seven years. We meet sporadically throughout the year sometimes all six of us, sometimes a few of us.

“I thank my God every time I remember you. In all my prayers for all of you, I always pray with joy because of your partnership in the gospel from the first day until now, being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” Philippians 1:3-6

Through the petitions of these prayer warriors those who have children and grandchildren, each name has been lifted to God’s throne. One mother has seen God redeem her son from an alcohol addiction and now Jesus is his addiction. Another friend has been undergirded as she walked through the last couple of years of medical school, first years of marriage, residency and board tests, and ultimately starting her medical practice. Prayers have been lifted as many of us have made moves during these years. Several of us have been covered in prayer through the loss of a father. These are just a few of the prayers we have lifted toward heaven together.

Words of wisdom and encouragement have flowed back and forth between us. Meals have been shared, hugs have been freely given, and the love of Jesus among us has been the cord that binds us together.

I am humbled by the prayers each of these women have lifted on behalf of me and my family. So this week, for days 21-25, I have opened cards and written a note for L, P, S, M, and M. I am grateful for these pray warrior women who have my back!

There are also two other prayer warrior women whom God has placed in my life the last couple of years. I am deeply grateful for their friendship and willingness to open their hearts. They have prayed for me and offered encouragement. For days 26 and 27 I drop a card to K and R, praying for them and being grateful for their prayers.

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Because I started a few days into October my card writing has carried over a few days. For days 28-31 I feel led to write a note of thanks to the men and women God has chosen as leaders in my life. One is the pastor and his wife of the fellowship we left in May. His teaching has always been challenging and encouraging. She has been an enthusiastic, fun leader for the children. Another is a women’s leader who gave me the courage to step out and participate more fully. I so appreciate her listening ear and then providing the opportunity for me to express God’s gifting. The last two cards I feel led to send to the current pastor and associate pastor. To pray for those who are in a place of leadership in my life right now.

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As I drop the last of the cards in the mail the phone rings. It is one of my long-time friends. God has timed the cards so that she receives my appreciation and affection the day her birth mom passes away. What an awesome God to care for her in such a tender way.

This challenge has opened my eyes and stirred my heart to see the wonderful, amazing people-gifts God has placed in this life. My life a string of knots and each individual a pearl on the thread.

“Through Jesus, therefore, let us continually offer to God a sacrifice of praise – the fruit of lips that confess his name. And do not forget to do good and to share with others, for with such sacrifices God is pleased.” Hebrews 13:15-16

Teaching Treasures

2011-11-03T06:00:00.000-05:00

Field trip! The youngest two and I are constantly on the lookout for libraries, museums, and historic villages in little towns around our area. Last week a homeschool friend and I met at a historic village about 30 minutes from our house. The town has eight building that have been set up in a Depression era style.

The curator took the children the around the museum part explaining how life was during the Depression. She then informed us we were free to enjoy all the buildings for as long as we would like to stay. Enjoy the buildings we did. In the general store the children played checkers and took turns running the store and post office. In the school house they took turns being teacher and students. We all enjoyed the hands activities of each exhibit. Their imaginations were really stirred. I appreciate the books and glasses on the nightstand.

Picture Developing, Part II

2011-11-02T08:28:00.000-05:00

“Now he was a man wholly surrendered, a man utterly obedient, a man who possessed nothing. …he knew that he owned nothing, that his real treasures were inward and eternal.” 1

After days of struggle I return to my reading of The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer. The very day after I publish Picture Developing I read as Tozer walks through the harsh experience of Abraham after God instructed him to sacrifice his only son. I want to hold tight to the children (treasures) God has given, I am asked to let go. To trust God while He is developing the picture of their lives.

“We are often hindered from giving up our treasures to the Lord out of fear for their safety; this is especially true when those treasures are loved relatives and friends. But we need have no such fears. Our Lord came not to destroy but to save. Everything is safe which we commit to Him, and nothing is really safe which is not so committed.” ¹ (emphasis mine)

It is so comforting when God sees me, where my heart is wrestling. I raise my hands and pray – naming each child – they are safer in His hands than mine. Tozer ends the chapter with a prayer. It sounds like a consuming prayer to this soul seeking to be consumed.

“Father, I want to know Thee, but my coward heart fears to give up its toys. I cannot part with them without inward bleeding, and I do not try to hide from Thee the terror of the parting. I come trembling, but I do come. Please root from my heart all those things which I have cherished so long and which have become a very part of my living self, so that Thou mayest enter and dwell there without a rival. Then shalt Thou make the place of Thy feet glorious. Then shall my heart have no need of the sun to shine in it, for Thyself wilt be the light of it, and there shall be no night there. In Jesus' Name, Amen.” ²

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¹ Tozer, A. W. (Aiden Wilson) (2011-03-24). The Pursuit of God (pp. 19-20). Kindle Edition.

² Tozer, A. W. (Aiden Wilson) (2011-03-24). The Pursuit of God (p. 21). Kindle Edition.

Picture Developing

2011-11-01T06:00:00.000-05:00

It is the end of a long, rough week. Earlier in the week, during the middle of the night I awoke feeling heavy pain in my chest. My mind runs amuck with thoughts about heart attacks. Thank God for a diagnosis or I would not sleep at all (though with the pain I don’t sleep well anyway). The arthritis in the chest wall is inflamed. It doesn’t bother often, but when it does it hurts.

I wake up and fix a fresh pot of coffee and sit down at the kitchen table. The night struggle with pain has left me feeling sluggish and weak. I sit and ponder how I thought life would look by this point. The reality is not exactly what I pictured when I was younger.

I pictured children eager to be taught and learn, who would love being home together. The reality is they fuss too often, I fuss too often. The reality is, after struggling for months, this homeschooling mom enrolled child #4 in public school. He desires to play sports, this is the best way we have to offer him the opportunity. He is not able to focus or manage his time well, he needs more structure. There are too many distractions at home. This is the child who feels that libraries are too loud for studying. Perhaps in a classroom setting where everyone is focused on the same subject during the same period he will find the structure he needs.

I pictured close relationships between parents and children as they moved toward adulthood. The reality is, okay, with Darling daughter and Dear son-in-love it is sweet. They are a blessing to this mom heart. The reality is, with children #2 and 3, these two boys, stretching their wings and moving away from home. As they are becoming men their decisions, choices, give this mom cause for concern and plenty of opportunity to trust God.

I pictured as children moved out that the financial pressures would ease up. The reality is, with everyone hard pressed in this economy, finances are still a struggle. It seems Precious husband works harder for what seems to barely stretch far enough. Our house project sits still on the hill – waiting.

Opening Scripture I read,

“Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits” Psalm 103:2

Why is it so hard to see the benefits? Why does it feel like the benefits are so few? Maybe because I tend to seek the tangible benefits. I want to see how the picture will turn out and now would be a good time. The greatest benefits are those that are not seen with human eyes but with spiritual eyes. Benefits that are not temporal but eternal.

Praise the Lord, O my soul,

who forgives all my sins – not just a few, but all my sins

who heals all my diseases – not just physical disease, but spiritual and emotional disease as well

who redeems my life from the pit – pit of death, pit of hell, pit of insecurity, pit of anger, pit of self-pity, pit of ____(you fill in the blank)

who crowns me with love and compassion – He sets a crown upon my head, a crown of everlasting love and compassions that are new every morning

who satisfies my desires with good things – His daily presence – manna, developing Christ like character, character takes perseverance, endurance to develop

so that my youth is renewed like the eagle’s – ability to soar higher and see more clearly, stamina to persevere

When I picture my life through the lens of God’s Word I see, hear, feel the truth. The Father daily loads me with benefits, but I must take the time to focus on eternity.

In those moments where the cares of life threaten to choke out the Word I must pull the weeds giving room for the seed to grow. I stop to SEE GOD in the midst of out of focus pictures. For the pictures are not fully developed yet, they are still being processed. Only God above knows how they will look in the end. It is time for me to step back and watch a Master artist at work as He develops the picture He desires.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-10-30T06:00:00.000-05:00

“I will make a covenant of peace with them and rid the land of wild beasts so that they may live in the desert and sleep in the forests in safety.” Ezekiel 34:25

Teaching Treasures

2011-10-27T06:00:00.000-05:00

The weather turns cold and dreary one day so we pull out canvas, brushes, and paint. Two youngest find pictures they like and I trace them onto the canvas. They fill in with colors from nature. I take colors and an image I have seen and try to recreate it on the canvas. We work diligently all day putting the brush to canvas bringing the art to the front. At the end of the day we are all pleased with the results.

Another day the weather is perfect for sitting outside A few clouds hang in the sky and the temperature is a moderate 70 degrees. We load the van and drive up the hill to the pasture. Sensitive son sets up his hammock and Princess daughter pulls out a camping chair. They both open English books while a curious goat glances over Sensitive son’s shoulder.

We enjoy the freedom of schooling indoors, outdoors, or wherever we happen to be. I have been known to take school to the beach and even to the mountains. I am always on the lookout for creative ways to learn. Two youngest share my enthusiasm and are always on scanning for signs that read museum or library.

31 Days–Week 3

2011-10-25T06:00:00.000-05:00

Pulling out a box of cards I think back over my life and thank God for friendships that have stood the test of time. These are people who I shared life closely with at one point on the journey. Even though time and distance have separated, I still keep in touch with most of them. Slowly I write each note, praying, expressing gratitude for these relationships…

Day 14 - The friend I have known since 8th grade. We shared the ups and downs of high school. She was the maid-of-honor at our wedding. Her life has blossomed into a pastor’s wife with three lovely daughters. Hard to believe we have known each other for over 30 years – it just seems like yesterday we were teenagers.

Day 15 - The friend from our days at college. We shared being pregnant together, twice. Even to the point of living together for five or six months of our first pregnancies. We have shared parenting tools, lending listening ears, and many prayers together. I am glad we have shared the last 24 years of life together – sometimes in the same state, sometimes separated by many miles.

Day 16 – The friend who reached out a hand of friendship after a particularly difficult move from one state to another. Her faith and perseverance through her own difficult physical trials and other personal trials has inspired me so many times. Our days of lunch breaks under the trees, ice cream runs, and quiet dinners only lasted a little over a year, but our friendship has continued for 23 years despite living three states apart.

Day 17 – The single guy who became a friend to Precious husband at an exciting part of our journey. His love for the Lord and tender heart for others always evident. Watching his life expand to a wife and two beautiful girls was a blessing.

Day 18 – The young married couple who moved in next door to Precious Husband and I while our husband’s were in college. Their challenging my faith and driving me to search the Scriptures to prove what I believed. I still believe those things, but their challenge gave me the ability to share my beliefs.

Day 19 - The friend who welcomed us to a new fellowship when we were battle weary from a previous place of worship. She reached out and has loved our children well. Our children have found solid friendships in her children. When my father was ill and at the point of death she took the children into her home and loved them as her own freeing Precious husband and I to be at the hospital full time with my father and mother.

Day 20 – The married couple who was in our lives for a time and encouraged my growth in the Lord. Their belief and encouragement that I could hear from the Lord and had a gift to offer Christ’s body.

I close each card, push it into the envelope, and lick the nasty seal. As I write the address on the front I think of how each of these individuals has imparted a part of themselves into my heart. They have all magnified Jesus by their life and I have been changed because of them.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-10-23T06:00:00.000-05:00

“We were slaves…but the Lord brought us out of Egypt with a mighty hand….He brought us out from there to bring us in and give us the land that he promised on oath to our forefathers.” Deuteronomy 6:21, 23

“For he has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son he loves in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.” Colossians 1:13-14

Shades of Fall

2011-10-18T06:00:00.000-05:00

31 Day Challenge–Week 2

2011-10-17T06:00:00.000-05:00

Foundations are built by wise families. In a family it is easy to take one another for granted. Here I have an opportunity to say thanks for the friendships forged through time shared together as family. I pull out the cards and pen to express my gratitude.

DAY 7 – She gave me birth, raised me in the paths of righteousness, and continues to council me with Godly wisdom. My mom has become a trusted friend and advisor. She walks with strength and dignity and I am blessed to be her daughter.

DAY 8 – Precious husband has been a source of stability, security, and strength as we have journeyed life together these last 27 years. He has challenged me to stretch, to grow, and given me the confidence to try new things. He is a selfless, caring father to our children and a strong support to me. He is my best friend.

DAY 9 – Our eldest child, darling daughter, has grown into a woman of faith. She stands bold and confident in the Lord. She is creative and artistic, we enjoy these pursuits in common. It is a pleasure to watch her grow as a wife and mother, to grow as friends at this time of life.

DAY 10 – This past weekend one of my mom’s sisters came to the farm and went to a harvest festival with us. She is totally thoughtful – never forgetting to send a card for a birthday or anniversary. She has always been one in my life to celebrate the milestone moments.

DAY 11 – Precious husband has a sister who has impacted my life through her friendship. She made me feel welcome and part of the family when I felt like an outsider. She brought joy and laughter during times of trial in her own life.

DAY 12 – Precious husband also has an aunt who has always welcomed us into her home. She is an amazing hostess and cook! She takes the time to listen and learn about our lives. She is always kind and encouraging.

DAY 13 – My mom has another sister who is a friend. She paints lovely china, mugs and even rocks. She creates fun jewelry and crochets useful items. She generously shares her creations and her abilities. We have shared letters over the years as she and her family moved around out west. She always offered words of encouragement.

I have been greatly blessed by those in my family who have poured into my life. Perhaps this will encourage someone to take the time to give thanks to God for family friendships.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-10-16T06:00:00.000-05:00

“All things have been committed to me by my Father. No one knows who the Son is except the Father, and no one knows who the Father is except the Son and those to whom the Son chooses to reveal him.”

Then he turned to his disciples and said privately, “Blessed are the eyes that see what you see.” Luke 10:22-23

31 Days–Week 1

2011-10-15T06:00:00.000-05:00

DAY 1 I opened our farm the first Monday of October to one of the ladies I meet the first few weeks at our new fellowship. She brought her three girls out for the afternoon. Her girls played with the goats and chickens and roamed the woods with my three. We sat in the sun and spent the time getting to know one another. It was such a relaxing afternoon. So on Tuesday I took the time to drop her a card expressing my thanks.

DAY 2 Wednesday night the Bible study leader was very transparent and honest. This is a trait I have noticed in her since the class began back in August. It is an admirable quality and has brought an intimacy and openness to the class. The study they have chosen has so fit with my desert journey with the Lord. On Thursday I arose early so I could write a card letting her know how much I appreciate all her work to make this Bible study life changing.

DAY 3 I met a woman at the gym, Princess daughter calls her my gym friend. Shortly after we began going to the gym she motioned for me to leave the treadmill and join an aerobic class. It was 60 minutes of pouring sweat but it was a lot of laughs at my lack of rhythm and missing steps. Princess daughter and I have continued the class. I am glad she took the time to invite me to class. Friday I jot her a note to drop off at the gym.

DAY 4 There is another woman in the Wednesday night Bible study who has made me feel so included. When I enter the building she opens her arms wide and embraces me. She takes the time to look me in the eye and inquire how things are going. It even made me feel like one of the girls when she took the time to arrange my t-shirt properly. I love her boldness and zeal for the Lord. Saturday afternoon I take the time to pen her a thank you.

DAY 5 We spend so much time at the library it would be a shame not to mention how helpful the ladies there have been. Whether it is looking for a book, recommending a book, suggesting homeschool activities or ideas, or just keeping us on track with our returns, these women have been so kind. It was fun to have one of them recognize us as a homeschool family and offer a classroom timeline. Sunday evening late I express my thanks in a simple notecard.

DAY 6 Sunday mornings I have been attending a life group. One of the ladies there has been so helpful in finding information regarding youth activities. The Sunday church left the building she extended excitement to have me participate with her group. It went a long way to helping me feel relaxed and accepted. Monday morning I open my Bible and pray for her and her family. God brings a Scripture to mind which I place inside a card written for her.

I am an introvert and solitude does not really sink me. However, I leave the feeling of loneliness that first followed me when we moved to the farm. Taking a risk I open my heart wide to embrace these new relationships. God knows where time and our journey will lead – I just walk in gratitude for these people at this moment and their impact in my life.

Teaching Treasures

2011-10-13T06:00:00.000-05:00

One of our favorite places for schooling is our local public library. There are plenty of tables for everyone to spread out their assignments. Comfortable chairs are spread in quiet spots in order to encourage reading. Of course, there are lots of books to choose from.

We visited one local library several years ago. Fun son sat and tried to work, but after several minutes he turned to me and said, “I can’t do school here. It is too noisy.” It was a very busy library.

I have found different libraries have their own personality. Some are more formal, some are more relaxed, some are more technology driven, some are more cozy. The library staff at each has always been helpful. They truly want to encourage the joy of reading and learning.

31 Days or 4 Weeks

2011-10-12T06:00:00.001-05:00

The gym and the library have become my internet connection link. The only problem: the gym is for working out, the library is for schooling, neither leave much time for blog browsing. One of the blogs I check is The Unpaved Road by Michele. Her servant heart and love for people in Sudan exudes through every word. Her creativity and love for the Lord seeps into her photos and artwork. Recently she did a post and linked to a post here. The challenge was issued to take 31 days to discover those things that make us come alive. To follow through and then share the results.

Some have chosen thanksgiving, memory keeping, inspired holidays, or changing the world. Because we have chosen not to have internet installed at the farm it would not be practical for to blog each day. However, I do plan to participate for the next 31 days. I am already a few days behind, but no matter it is a good challenge, one I have actually already started (my first card was in the mail before I saw the challenge).

I have decided to take focus the next 31 days on friendship. Intentionally taking the time to hand write a card to people who have extended a heart of friendship and impacted my life by doing so. Once a week for the next four weeks I will share with how this is working out in my life.

This first week I will focus on new friends. Moving to the farm this past May has put this introvert out of my comfort zone, stretching me as I meet new people and search for a body of believers for fellowship. Thanks to a long-time friend we have found a new place to worship. The believers there have been most welcoming and accepting. I am grateful for new relationships.

HE IS

2011-10-11T06:00:00.000-05:00

“When we SEE GOD FOR WHO HE IS the strength of our idols lose their pull.”¹

Since July God has been encouraging me to SEE HIM FOR WHO HE IS. When I reach the page in the Bible study that holds the quote above a big grin spreads across my face. God was encouraging the children of Israel in the desert to do the same thing, SEE GOD FOR WHO HE IS.

HE IS…

Manna – The Bread of Life

Water – Living water

High Priest who meets my needs

Deliverer, Healer, Fashion Consultant for He clothes me with joy

These only begin to list who God is. The Father says it is time to pack the tents and leave the desert. This is difficult, I have become comfortable here in the desert. His presence has been near and carried me along the way.

“…The Israelites were somewhere between Egypt and the promised land, between full-on captivity and full-on freedom and blessing. Welcome to the perils of the desert.”²

Choose…

Let go…desert

the groping & the glory

Let God…freedom

the giants & the grace

No longer should I allow the idol of lack to keep me wasted in fear. I need to leave the idol of believing I am lacking or will always receive only lack and SEE GOD FOR WHO HE IS. He is full of grace and truth – His grace is completely sufficient.

“…because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete NOT LACKING anything.” James 1:3-4

It is time to exalt God’s strength, to be wasted for His glory. How do you see God?

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¹ Kelly Minter, No Other Gods, P. 138

² Kelly Minter, No Other Gods, P. 105

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-10-09T06:00:00.000-05:00

“And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God.” Micah 6:8

Teaching Treasures

2011-10-06T06:00:00.000-05:00

After the animals are fed, we get cleaned up and find a spot that fits the subject. Bible, Literature, History usually find us stretched out in a comfortable reading spot. Science, Math, and English require a table for working. Each works at their own pace and I am available to provide assistance and guidance when needed.

Most days everyone cooperates and the day runs smoothly. These days are productive and make homeschooling enjoyable. Other days we are easily distracted, in each others way, or just annoying one another. On these days I question my abilities. Every day I cling to these words…

“But He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Ready or not…

2011-10-04T17:33:00.001-05:00

After spending a week at the beach my mind is not fully back from vacation. Over the weekend dear son-in-love and a kind friend brought their animals to our place. So now we have goats, ducks, and a few more chickens to add to our chicken, horse, donkey menagerie. We are learning how to care for these new critters.

Monday rises and I don’t feel ready to start school, but ready or not we begin our second nine weeks. Monday afternoon some new friends come to the house and we enjoy roaming the woods and conversation.

Today I have lots of thoughts and ponderings in my mind but they will not come together in a cohesive manner. Precious husband and I ride the ATV up the hill to check on the new additions, so I will leave you with a few photos. Hope your week is off to a blessed start.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-10-02T06:00:00.000-05:00

You alone are the LORD. You made the heavens, even the highest heavens, and all their starry host, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. You give life to everything, and the multitudes of heaven worship you.

— Nehemiah 9:6

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Had to repost this verse after the amazing week we just spent at the beach - the last frolic of summer.

Teaching Treasures

2011-09-29T18:00:00.000-05:00

I mentioned last week that there would be some changes here. One of them being a change to the weekly Thursday format. For a time I will devote this space as a mini snapshot into our schooling adventures. After pondering what to call this endeavor I have settled on “Teaching Treasures.” I have been given the privilege of imparting treasures of knowledge to the treasures God has gifted into our lives. My desire is that they would grow in wisdom of the Lord first. Beyond that they would add the knowledge of academic understanding through books and beyond to real life learning.We have been on vacation this week thanks to Precious husband’s hard work. The three that are currently schooling started in July so we could take this time off. The teacher in me is always looking for opportunities to encourage learning through hands on, real life experiences. Our oldest child once made the statement, “Everything is school to you.” So true, life is one big learning adventure in my eyes.

On Monday we saw this…

so we discussed jellyfish and then did a little internet research and decided this was a cannonball jellyfish or more accurately stomolophus meleagris.

We also observed clouds like this…

which led to a discussion about the water cycle. We found a link with basic information and facts…

which also lead to a discussion about cloud types. Check here to learn a lot about clouds – how they were named and how to identify them.

The boys also learned how to replace kitchen and bathroom faucets. After all, this is a working vacation.

“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men,” Colossians 3:23

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I have been trying to memorize Colossians, the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. How appropriate the verses for memorization this week land in Colossians 3:

Ingredients for Intimacy

2011-09-27T06:00:00.000-05:00

Precious husband is working close to the beach this week. Three youngest and I pack our bags, pack the van to take the trip with him. On the way down we enjoy a fun car show and kiddos get to pretend they are driving an Indy racecar. We arrive at the beach house in time to watch our favorite football team have a great second half. Then we take a slow stroll at sunset.

I like how they decorate hay bales here close to the beach.

Sunday morning Precious husband is up early. Knowing we are here because of work, he checks out the to-do-list and makes a list of supplies. Then we head to the beach while waiting for the hardware store to open. Our big red dog is fascinated with crabs yet wise enough to keep far away from the pinchers.

The afternoon is spent gathering supplies, napping, and for me hanging in the hammock with Psalm 119. I lean long into the repetition of words.

“I run in the paths of your commands, for your have set my heart free.” Psalm 119:35“I will walk about in freedom, for I have sought your precepts.” Psalm 119:46

“My soul is consumed with longing for your laws at all times.” Psalm 119:20

“Simply put this is relationship. Coming to Him, hearing from Him, putting other things aside that get in the way – and speaking back to Him – all of these make up the ingredients for intimacy…with God.” ¹

The word “Meditate” – repeats itself over and over throughout the Psalm. I close my eyes…

Meditate…

“God is good and what He does is good”

Psalm 119:68a

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¹ Kelly Minter, No Other Gods, P. 130

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-09-25T06:00:00.000-05:00

Changes

2011-09-22T06:00:00.000-05:00

It seems life around here has been nothing but change for the last several months. Moving, Gold-hearted-mom going and coming, children growing, trying our hand at gardening and raising chickens and moving a house just to name a few. The seasons change and I feel the need to continue the changes – shake things up a bit in a small way. So I change the blog background, whew, glad that is over with. At least until a new background catches my eye.

Moving with that theme I decide to change postings around as well. Not sure exactly how that is going to look yet but here are my initial ideas. Perhaps a community post from The High Calling Blog or Ann’s place may catch my attention and I will follow that thought. These are not set in stone they are more free flowing. They are just guides to keep me on track in this small space.

First, I will definitely keep Scripture Only Sunday. Lifting His Name high from the pages of His Holy Spirit inspired text. This is my foundational focus, The Word always before me.

I think Tuesdays will become my journal page. Where the rubber meets the road in my spiritual life. Lifting thoughts, prayers, Scriptures, poetry, maybe even a few of the images from the pages of my written journal and keeping them in this space.

Slowly, because that is how I do things, Thankful Thursday will be transitioning to the gratitude page in the page link above. Here I will keep adding to my running list of graces the Lord gives. I am thinking of changing this day to a snapshot into our homeschool days. Mainly as a way for me to remember that homeschooling my children is a privilege. Some days it can seem like such drudgery – perhaps being reminded that being their teacher is a grace the Lord has given will bring the encouragement my soul needs. It will also help serve to remind me that we also do a lot of fun things together as we are schooling.

Hope for a Promised Land

2011-09-21T06:00:00.000-05:00

We’ve been living in a falling in farmhouse for almost five months now. The whole log house project is still in parts but finally all on the property. Chickens have their coop and yard, the garden spot is done for the summer season, soon darling daughter’s goats will have a home here as well.

Spiritually I’ve been camping with the children of Israel in the desert. Gazing at the top of the mountain where the glory of the Lord looks like a consuming fire. Here in the desert I’ve been trusting God for daily manna and refreshing water. Jesus has become my cornerstone and companion as desert gods have been revealed and rooted out.

The children of Israel keep looking to their past – “wouldn’t it have been better for us to go back to Egypt?” Better to go back to bondage? To harsh taskmasters? To lives made bitter by hard labor? I have found myself tangled in this kind of thinking. Better to go back because of fear of what the future might hold, because of fear that past experience will be repeated?

The desert walk was a path to freedom. God’s children being free to follow Him with their whole heart. There would be giants to fight and walls that needed to come tumbling down in order for freedom to be obtained. God was leading his children to be free.

“The land is exceedingly good…If the Lord is pleased with us, he will lead us into that land,…and will give it to us…do not be afraid of the people…because we will swallow them up…the Lord is with us. Do not be afraid…” Numbers 14:7-9

The land of freedom is exceedingly good. The Lord is there and is pleased by obedience. The truth is, rejection and hurts will come. In the land of promise bitterness does not have to be the outcome. In the promised land the Lord is with me and the Lord abounds in love and forgiveness.

Google image

Hope is found in the promised land. The children of Israel didn’t know what the promised land would be like. They knew what slavery in Egypt was like – but things were changing. I can’t be free, move into new seasons, by holding on. Must let go of the past, don’t look back, shoulders that are burdened must let heavy loads drop off as feet are set toward freedom.

“But my servant Caleb has a different spirit and follows me wholeheartedly. I will bring him into the land…” Numbers 14:24

Father, give me a different spirit to follow you with my whole heart. To be consumed by desire to obey your commands. Father, show me how to make room in my heart for your kingdom to come – for promised land living. Help me see reality according to your truth. To understand that there will be giants and strong fortresses, but God, you are greater than any other.

When I see God for who He is I rest in the truth that He is greater than any other. The seasons get ready to change, joy falls like leaves softly floating on the breeze, and hope is renewed in the presence of God. For His presence and peace go ahead into the promised land.
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Sharing together with others who consider what hope looks like.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-09-18T06:00:00.000-05:00

“…do not fear…do not be frightened…In your heart set apart Christ as Lord.” 1 Peter 3:14-15

Hold These Things Dear…

2011-09-17T00:48:00.000-05:00

I click through photos on the computer. Memories bring a smile to my face and I want to hold them dear, cherish them in the heart. I am remembering fall from years past and looking forward to wandering through the woods in the days ahead. What do you look forward to the most in the fall?

Have a wonderful weekend!

Thankful Thursday

2011-09-15T06:00:00.000-05:00

It has been an unusual day. We arrive early for service which turns out to be a blessing as all three children are exhorted to hop on a van for the youth are ready to head toward their project for the day. I am left standing with a wonderful friend wondering where God would assign me for the day. She invites me to join her and her husband with the group they will work with for the day.

The fellowship of believers we have been visiting since July has a unique service this day. They entitle it “The Church has Left the Building”, on this Sunday they have no formal worship service, they leave the building and they look for opportunities to minister the love of Christ to the local community. I understand later that the idea came from another body of Christ seeking to be the hands and feet of the Lord to a hurting world.

As the afternoon winds down the sanctuary is empty but I feel full. I close my eyes and inhale, listening to the silence. The worship team slowly trickles in and begin to tune their instruments, one note at a time, bringing melody and harmony to each string as they join the keyboard. With eyes remaining closed I listen to the notes rise around me. My heart’s gaze turns toward heaven. Later as the stories rise of a day spent glorifying God through actions it seems like notes in unison lift toward heaven.

“Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests.” Luke 2:14

Father – today, in this moment, I am thankful for…

words of conviction stirring my heart

idols and fears revealed and toppled

Princess daughter’s help with Little One

Little One spending the night for the first time

Safety for Darling daughter and Dear son-in-love as they travel out of town

excitement of Your people to serve

laughter with those who belong to You

hands and feet reaching out in Jesus name

arms welcoming, open wide when entering your sanctuary

finding a home – a place to fellowship

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I am thankful for those of you who stop by this place and have prayed over the last few months for us to find a new place of worship. Be encouraged that God has heard and answered your prayers. From the bottom of my heart I thank you.

Desert Gods

2011-09-13T10:52:00.000-05:00

I suppose if you walk in the desert long enough God leads you to a place where you realize you have erected other gods. The children of Israel demanded Aaron give them a god to serve. My weak flesh finds another god to serve. I read this statement, “Fear is the guard that stands outside the castle where our idol lives…fear protects our idols”¹ and it strikes me to the core. The fear in my heart rises into my throat and I know God and I must deal with this head on for His Spirit in me longs for Him to be the center of my heart sanctuary.

With God’s help I begin to search, I ask Him to examine my heart, and a stronghold of the enemy is found. “Lack” has become a god and built a fortress to “protect” my heart. Satan has fed me a lie and I have bought it hook – line – and sinker. The Spirit reveals all the lies…

Lack of security…lack of worth…lack of acceptance…lack of homeschooling abilities…lack of parenting abilities…lack of finances…lack of friends…lack of good company…lack of ability to be used by God…

Fear has stood guard at the gate and it is hard to say goodbye for the fear of the giants. Fear of hurt and pain if rejected – again. Fear of emptiness, loneliness, disappointment. My soul aches behind these strong walls, I crave their “protection”. The Spirit speaks – the walls are a prison holding me captive. Captive to years of wasting away behind the strong tower.

Father, how do I destroy this false god?

The story of the rich young man has come up in my Bible study more than once over the last few weeks. He craved eternal life, he sought to live a holy life, following all the rules. But there was another god in his life. Jesus remedy…

“Jesus looked at him and loved him. “One thing you lack, he said, Go, sell everything you have and give to the poor, and then you will have treasure in heaven. Then come, follow me.” Mark 10:21

…lack more² – give up the idol that stands between you and God. I don’t have to stay imprisoned. The idol that stands in the way – together God and I can clean house and make room in my heart for the promises of God.

“With man this is impossible, but not with God, All things are possible with God.” Mark 10:27

“I don’t have to close off doors to people in my life anymore. I can invite them in.”³

The truth is, Jesus is my stronghold. He is my fortress. I search the Scriptures and find the do not fear verses. Together we can turn this prison into a sanctuary of the Lord’s presence, for in Him my heart can rest secure.

“He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and fortress, my God, in whom I trust.” Psalm 91:1-2

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¹ Kelly Minter, No Other Gods, p.49

² Kelly Minter, No Other Gods, p.112

³ Anadara, No Other Gods, p.113

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-09-11T06:00:00.000-05:00

“What is more, I consider everything a loss compared

to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord,

for whose sake I have lost all things.

I consider them rubbish,

that I may gain Christ.” Philippians 3:8

Thankful Thursday

2011-09-08T10:55:00.000-05:00

I climb the hill one evening chasing the sunset. The heat of August turns the ground to dust so fine it feels like baby powder beneath my feet.

I sit back and watch the sun sink below the horizon and the sliver of moon rise. Gazing toward the sky I feel like I am in a snow globe, round dome above.

September begins as I soak up the quiet of the evening before heading back down the hill. I take the quiet with me into the next few days that are filled with activity, challenges, and fun.

With Gold-hearted mom and three youngest I walk the streets of my hometown and enjoy the annual (for the last 5 years) Butterbean Festival. I hear music rise and one voice in particular brings memories flooding. I would know his singing anywhere for he sang in our wedding over 27 years ago. It was nostalgic to stop and listen as songs of praise were raised. Mom calls later and says our picture was placed on the local paper website – it shows her enjoying a bowl of butterbeans.

Sunday afternoon as rain settles into our area we spend the time at a friend’s new home with her family. She and I have known each other about eight years now. She is truly and incredible woman of God. She and her husband have recently moved back to Alabama. Her parents and girls, his parents, three youngest and I enjoy their hospitality. Lunch, cards, video games and an awesome host keep the kids entertained. We take time to sit on the deck in the back and listen to the rain fall through the trees as we enjoy encouraging conversation.

Monday morning dawns with a tropical storm dumping a front yard pond of rain. Many places in the area are flooded and without power. We enjoy the holiday with books, movies, popcorn, and a romp in the rain.

There have been challenges this week as well – bills, mom’s basement flooded and a tree in her yard fell on a neighbor’s fence, challenge son is still without a vehicle or consistent job. I want to stick my head in the sand and not have to deal with these problems. Precious husband offers his strength to these moments.

By Thursday morning the sun is shining so I make my way to the overgrown garden and chicken coop. Sensitive son has been making his way in the rain for the last several mornings. The okra and sunflowers are blown over so I take what remains to see if I can dry the sunflowers and harvest the seeds. The chickens get the last of the okra.

I stop in the middle of the pasture on my way back to the house and turn my face to the sun. I let the cool breeze lift my hair from my forehead. Inhaling deeply I fill up with the quiet of the morning. These moments of quiet in this field fill me with a peace from the Lord to take back down and embrace each moment. To take care of the things I can and leave the rest to the Lord.

Father – this week I am grateful for…

husband that deals with difficulties and challenges

his protection and strength

voices raised in praise to Your name – used to glorify You for so many years

quiet moments in the middle of the pasture

dust, later mud squishing between toes

back to ground gazing upon the splendor of a night sky

children playing in the rain

sunflower seeds

sensitive son feeding the chickens in the rain

card games with new friends

lunch at friends new home

reconnecting with this family

rhythms of life

scented candles

cooler weather

Desert reflections

2011-09-06T06:00:00.000-05:00

It is a rainy Monday morning, tropical storm Lee is pushing through the southeast. I open Bible and journal along with a cup of coffee and blueberry muffin. The Scriptures become familiar because I have walked here, entered here before. In 2009 God took me on a tabernacle walk with the children of Israel. Now I have wandered through the desert and come back to the tabernacle.

God is the center - the center of the Israelite camp, the center of the tabernacle, the center of life. God directs in such a way, leading, feeding, being with His people, that my focus is to be consumed by His Presence. The cross of Christ and His resurrection become the center of my life.

“The people you live among will see how awesome is the work that I, the Lord, will do for you.” Exodus 34:10b

God wanted the nations to see, through the children of Israel, that He is awesome. God was to so fill them they reflected His glory to the nations. I think back to a recent blog post from Jennifer. She writes, “I untangle the line from the tip of the rod, and I look deeper into the obsidian mirror. Past me, I see it. Heaven: That which is bigger than me. Kingdom of God: That which lives in me.” Then later a conversation with a dear friend about reflections as she shared photos from a recent trip she and her husband took.

I ponder the children of Israel in the desert with God living among them, His laws written on stone. What does this mean for me Father? Teach me to look deeper, to see that which is bigger than me. Your Kingdom living in me. For Your grace has been written on my heart with the ink of Jesus blood shed for my sin. God consume my life in such a way I reflect Your glory. Do I reflect Your image and work in my life so that others see that You are awesome?

“And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into His likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord who is the Spirit.” 2 Corinthians 3:18

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-09-04T06:00:00.000-05:00

“Don’t you know that you yourselves are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit lives in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him; for God’s temple is sacred, and you are that temple.” 1 Corinthians 3:16-17

Thankful Thursday

2011-09-01T06:00:00.000-05:00

I keep it handy on my bedside table and often take the time to flip through Ann’s book, again. I reread all the places that sank deep into the soul the first with the first reading.

“Please tell me your name. We have named the graces and there found His name, Glory, and in the face of man we see the face of God.

Then Him, the blessing, God, joy-water in the desert.” Ann Voskamp

It rains, even in the desert, and the hardy flowers bloom and give fragrance testifying that God is good, even in the broken places. So I keep counting the blessings, even the ones that don’t seem like blessings. Because in God’s hands,

“We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” Romans 8:23

Father – this week I am trusting you and giving thanks for the difficult, desert circumstances…

insurance that won’t pay … yet

transmission not fixed … yet

son doesn’t have a job … yet

chickens haven’t laid eggs … yet

-- and I am thankful for the rain and flowers in the desert as well…

cool showers on hot days

homemade waffles with butter and syrup

fried okra from the garden

cantaloupe from the garden

birthday cards and kind words

birthday lunch with an awesome woman after Your heart

dinner out with Precious husband and Helpful son

Gold-hearted mom arriving home safely

new ladies Bible study

tent of meeting - temple of my heart

joy-water in the desert - presence of God

Desert Companion

2011-08-30T06:00:00.000-05:00

In the desert God has brought me to the tent of meeting (Exodus 33). In the midst of the desert where my heart has felt dry – empty – even here His hand has guided me. His right hand is holding me.

“Moses said to the LORD, “You have been telling me, ‘Lead these people,’ but you have not let me know whom you will send with me. You have said, ‘I know you by name and you have found favor with me.’ If you are pleased with me, teach me your ways so I may know you and continue to find favor with you.” Exodus 33:12-13

God knows me by name. He created me and knows everything about me. When I sit or when I rise, before a word is on my tongue. There is nothing about me that God does not fully know.

On the dark days when His presence seems far away…

“It is in the dark that God is passing by … because God has tucked me in a cleft of the rock and covered me, protected me with His hand …” Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts

This is what I have always known to be true and it has been affirmed in my life. That there are “treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places.” In this desert we walk back to this truth…the treasures and riches are so that I can say, I know that you are Lord, the God of Israel, who summons me by name.

Moses would go into the tent of meeting, the Lord would speak to him and after Moses would return to camp. BUT his young aid Joshua did not leave the tent. I join Joshua here and I don’t want to leave because the Father, Jesus, the Spirit, and I are becoming companions. Here in the desert where God has lead me, to our tent of meeting, I stop and make space for God. I listen…

“…every moment is a message from The Word – God – who can’t stop writing His heart.” Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts

Daily I wake up hungry, daily He gives me manna and water. My heart is consumed with a desire to KNOW – to SEE GOD – who knows me by name. We are sitting at the kitchen table, two youngest and I, surrounded by Bible, journal, school books, coffee, and biscuits.

“Then the cloud covered the Tent of Meeting, and the glory of the LORD filled the tabernacle.” Exodus 40:34

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-08-28T06:00:00.000-05:00

“I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.” Psalm 40:1-2

Thankful Thursday

2011-08-25T06:00:00.000-05:00

There is no end to the new things my husband will try and can do. He built the two primary residences we have lived in over the years. He has remodeled many more houses doing everything from the sheetrock, electric and plumbing work, pouring foundations, installing cabinets, tile-linoleum-wood floors, painting, landscaping. The list could go on because the man can do it all.

This past week he rented the equipment, had a friend come help, along with two of our sons, and they removed the moving beams from the house. Seeing those long beams come out was quite scary – I could not watch all the process. I was sincerely thankful when they were out!

He then taught the boys how to work a track hoe and later in the day one of the boys convinced me to climb in and give the equipment a try. We moved a mound of dirt around, expanded our water/swim hole and dug a hole to prepare for a septic tank (one day).

“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men.” Colossians 3:23

Precious husband works many hours to provide for our family. He has many jobs but the one that brings home the bacon is as a firefighter/paramedic. This vocation means he usually works every Sunday but one a month. Because of this he does not usually attend service. Wednesday night as we were headed to service one of our sons spoke with such insight. “Dad works hard, actions speak louder than words to him. He would rather be the church than go to church.”

We have taught them that church is more than a building or group gathered on Sunday morning. We are the church and should behave as such wherever we go.

Father – Thank you for giving this son insight into the heart of his father. Many others miss this truth and misunderstand Precious husband because of that. Help us to be Your church wherever we go – to work so that You are honored. Thank you for…

Precious husband, his heart for You, and his many abilities

Foundation of house strengthened

Moving beams removed from house

Safety while removing beams

Learning to work a track hoe

Homeschooling – practical application – boys eager to learn

Water/Swim hole enlarged

Chicken coop rearranged

Curious chickens checking out the new arrangement

A friend meeting me for brunch, thanks “K”

Desert Cornerstone

2011-08-23T06:00:00.000-05:00

Since moving to the farm in May we have been visiting a few local churches. The people have been friendly but I had forgotten how difficult it can be to find a new place of fellowship. A dear friend recommended a place she and her husband had been visiting since moving to the area in April. So at the first of July we begin visiting.

The first Sunday as the worship began the first line included words about a desert and continues about all our fountains being in Christ. God had been speaking to me about Christ – the living water. Several songs later the words “consume me from the inside out” were sung and my ears were definitely listening. We have quietly been attending and it has not always been easy. There are differences from our last place of fellowship and it can be difficult. One week it is fine, the next a child is in tears because it is hard to be the outsider.

I keep journeying through Exodus, walking in the desert with God’s children. The Father feeds me with daily manna as I seek Him. I drink deeply from His springs of life. I am learning about camping – staying still and then moving when the Father gives instruction. Here the Father continues the process of revealing Himself and opening my eyes to deal with my sin-sick heart. He leads me through a process of confession which leads to a period of consecration.

The Spirit expounds on His teaching about drinking from the Rock. Thoughts from these verses flow through my mind…

“They all (the Israelites) ate the same spiritual food and drank the same spiritual drink; for they drank from the spiritual rock that accompanied them, and that rock was Christ.” 1 Corinthians 10:3-4

I look up other verses on a Tuesday morning about cornerstones…

“So this is what the Sovereign Lord says: See, I lay in Zion, a tested stone, a precious cornerstone for a sure foundation; the one who trusts will never be dismayed.” Isaiah 28:16; Romans 9:33

The Wednesday night classes begin and we attend. From the groups available I choose the women’s Bible study. I am late and rather embarrassed but take a seat anyway. The discussion continues and they are discussing Exodus where God hears the cries of His people. One of the women comments how in the desert God wanted the Israelites to learn total dependence on Him – He provided for their every need. Their daily food and water, their clothes and shoes did not wear out, He sheltered them from the heat with a cloud by day and from the cool by a pillar of fire at night, He was their front and rear guard.

I sit on a Thursday afternoon to begin a blog post on Christ being our cornerstone – the Rock of Salvation – in the desert. As the thoughts roll around in my mind I pick up the hand out from the Wednesday night class. One of the suggested readings is from Isaiah 44 and I begin to read when verse 8 stops me…

“Do not tremble, do not be afraid. Did I not proclaim this and foretell it long ago? You are my witnesses, Is there any God besides me? No, there is no other Rock, I know not one.” Isaiah 44:8

He lays the stepping stones before me that lead straight to His sure foundation. Only a God who hears my cries would so lovingly fill this thirsty child’s cup and entreat me to drink deeply from the spiritual rock who is Jesus.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-08-21T06:00:00.000-05:00

“If we live, we live for the Lord; and if we die, we die for the Lord. So, whether we live or die, we belong to the Lord.” Romans 14:8

Thankful Thursday

2011-08-18T06:00:00.000-05:00

The nature of camping is that it gets me out into nature. The whole of creation surrounds as the tent is set up and a fire pit is made. Out in the middle of the forest I am more aware of God’s presence.

I have never lived or camped in a desert even though I walk dry dusty places in my heart. The children of Israel were camped in the Desert of Sinai when they saw God’s smoke and fire, when they heard God’s thundering from the mountain. They must have been more aware of God’s presence there.

As I journey through this desert of my heart and hear the Lord ask me to camp at the base of the mountain for a while, hear Him ask me to SEE HIM FOR WHO HE IS, I am becoming more aware of God’s presence.

Isn’t that what giving thanks, counting the blessings of life is all about, becoming more aware of God’s presence in my daily life. I remember doing a Beth Moore Bible study several years ago where she encourages readers to STOP…Savor The Observable Presence of God in life.

When I have been camping the days were more leisurely. There was hiking and playing in the streams or slow cooking food over an open fire. I took time to notice rocks on the path or the shape of leaves or the pattern of tree bark. I saw things differently.

I want to see God differently on this desert journey. Not as one who has abandoned me or is insensitive to the difficulties of my life, I have thought this in the past, but as one who has led me here to bring me into a better understanding of who He is. As I list the things I am grateful for I STOP and SEE GOD FOR WHO HE IS, I get a glimpse of His glory.

Father, this week I am abundantly grateful for…

WHO GOD IS… Full of grace (John 1:14)

Reveals Himself (Hebrews 6:17)

From Psalm 30 … Deliverer, a Resurrection God;

Healer, heals me;

Turns mourning into dancing;

Removes sackcloth, clothes me with joy

another birthday for Darling daughter

her physical growth – becoming a wife and mom

her spiritual growth – becoming a woman who seeks You

laughter around the game table at midnight

learning to milk a goat

Dear son-in-love teaching us to milk the goat

goats milk in coffee

warm banana bread

family photos

Desert Consecration

2011-08-16T06:00:00.000-05:00

Israel is camping at the base of the mountain of God and I stop here with them. God sends instructions for the people to consecrate themselves. They are to wash their clothes and be ready. Daily I stand at the crossroads, will I choose to stay consecrated? Considering the words that pour from lips, choice of music or television, the decisions of how to spend time and money? What do the choices say about my relationship to God?

I looked up the word consecrated in Webster’s it is defined as “to declare or set apart as sacred, to dedicate, to make sacred (holy).”

“Or know ye not that the unrighteous shall not inherit the kingdom of God?…That is what some of you were! But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of our Lord Jesus the Messiah and by the Spirit of our God.” 1 Corinthians 6:10-11

Sanctified carries the same connection in the New Testament with the word hagiazó meaning “to make holy, consecrate, sanctify.” I stand at the base of the mountain and gaze upward, perhaps as the children of Israel did and I find…

“And mount Sinai, the whole of it, smoked, because Jehovah descended upon it in fire; and the smoke thereof ascended as the smoke of a furnace, and the whole mount quaked greatly.” Exodus 19:18

Jehovah descended upon another mountain in the form of Jesus who lay down His life on the cross. The mountain is filled with smoke, it quakes, and the God of heaven is the one who consecrates. Through Jesus I am washed and sanctified. I SEE GOD FOR WHO HE IS…One who consecrates His own – He has set me apart and makes me holy.

I navigate the crossroad longing to pursue holiness. Sin is costly and I have been stained with His glory. He has consecrated this life. When I see God for who He is I am grieved when I do not live a consecrated life. I rejoice when His Spirit gives me the ability to repent and walk a consecrated life.

I am brought back to this verse…

“…choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve…

but as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

Joshua 24:15

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-08-14T06:00:00.000-05:00

“…choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve…

but as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

Joshua 24:15

Thankful Thursday

2011-08-11T06:00:00.000-05:00

We are studying rhyming poetry in Literature class this week. I suggest they keep it simple. I try my hand at a few lines with the children.

Tomatoes on the window sill
    Ripening in the summer sun
Turn and flip around until
    Red and juicy they are done
Slice and dice, stomachs fill
    Savor portion of garden bounty.

Rising early I head to the garden spot and gather the few items that have matured. I enjoy the sunflowers with their bold faces gazing toward the sun.

I throw scratch to the chickens and sit a few minutes and watch their silly antics. I have planted a rose bush and some rosemary beside the chicken coop.

When the heat becomes intolerable we head to the gym and spend time working our bodies in a less hostile environment. The children talk about training for a 5K coming up in the fall. I’m not sure I will be ready but they are moving hard to make it happen. We swim in the pool for a while as we wait for the cooler part of the day before heading home.

Darling daughter and Dear son-in-love stop by the station on afternoon when we are all hanging out with Precious husband. He has been working long hours since the house was put back together. Another generation is introduced to fire trucks.

On one of Precious husband’s days off we head down the road to a local restaurant that has a pier outside. After dinner two youngest take advantage of a dip in the lake with an amazing sunset for a backdrop.

There have been hard days as well. Days when Helpful son’s truck breaks down. Yet I am grateful for boys working together (Challenge Son and Helpful Son) to get truck home while Precious husband is at station. The truck now sits in the basement while Helpful son tries to figure out how to fix the clutch.

The phone rings and it a call that makes the heart jump. Challenge son has had a car accident and needs more insurance information. He assures that he is okay but now his truck looks totaled. This are hard times. I begin to fret and worry.

Helpful son encourages, “Mom, it would be easy to count it pure joy if things were easy. The test comes when you count it joy when it is hard. Trust the one you read about in that book all the time.” The tears roll, I needed the support this 17-year-old has given.

So I count it all joy, for all of life is a gift. I reach for the book that has dared me to live more fully, right in where I am. Reading the words of the one who started me on this journey of counting the blessings. I flip to underlined words that feed the soul.

“When bridges seem to give way, we fall into Christ’s safe arms, true bridge…It is safe to trust! …The bridge and our lives shake not because God has abandoned, but the exact opposite: God is passing by, God is in the tremors.” ~Ann Voskamp, One Thousand Gifts

So to the One who teaches me to “Count it all joy, when ever you face trials of many kinds….” I speak grateful words…

Father, this week I am grateful for good days and sad days. They are all in your hands…

Red and green (may favorite) tomatoes on the window sill

Sunflowers that grew from seeds I planted

Rose bush and rosemary beside a chicken coop

Jogging on treadmills side by side with two youngest

A place to get cool on a hot summer day

Swimming

Children jumping off pier into the lake

Flaming sunsets

Times visiting Precious husband at station

Little One’s interest in Precious husband’s mustache

Laughter as lots of us play cards

Fried green tomatoes and okra

Car accidents where son is safe even if truck is not

Vehicles that break down

Sons who work to fix vehicles that break down

Desert Camping

2011-08-09T06:00:00.000-05:00

“When you have brought the people out of Egypt, you will worship God on this mountain.” Exodus 3:12

Moses was called to bring God’s people out of slavery – bondage – to the mountain to worship God. Walking through Exodus with the children of Israel I continue this desert journey. It has become a journey through the desert of my heart.

“…they entered the Desert of Sinai and Israel camped there in the desert in front of the mountain…” Exodus 19:2

desert camping
mountain foundation
strong, secure
trumpet sound
mountain trembles
smoke billows
mountain peak
blazing light
God’s glory
consuming fire

“…base our faith on WHO GOD IS rather than what He appears to be doing is crucial to our spiritual health.”¹

“As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than yours and my thoughts than your thoughts.” Isaiah 55:9

God asks me to stop and camp here at the base of the mountain for a while. Taking time to SEE GOD for WHO HE IS. I remember He is God who wants to be found, always full of grace and glory.

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¹ Beth Moore, Anointed, Transformed, Redeemed

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-08-07T06:00:00.000-05:00

“while we wait for the blessed hope—the appearing of the glory of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ, who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good.” Titus 2:13-14

Thankful Thursday

2011-08-04T06:00:00.001-05:00

The days become hotter and the weather more humid as we move toward school days. The library completes its summer reading session with a storytelling face-painter.
The weekend beckons and we share the joys of lives well lived as their 50th wedding anniversary is celebrated. They have been parents to Precious husband when he needed guidance, they have been friends and mentors as we raise our children, they have been a blessing.

During these days when it is too hot to move we start school in order to take a break and enjoy the cooler fall weather when it comes. The morning actually begins refreshing and rainy, but by afternoon the temperatures soar with the rising humidity levels. With box fans blowing we recline on the bed and school begins as a neighbor cuts an overgrown field in the downpour.

While Fun son is working at the zoo the two youngest and I ride down to Darling daughter’s and visit with her and little one. My how he has grown, hard to believe it has been over two weeks since we last saw him.

Through all the days I remember…

“And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” Colossians 3:17

…and I give thanks.
Father God, thank you for…
storytelling face-painters
friends who live lives worthy of imitation
50 years of sharing life & love
zoo volunteer days
rainy days
time for learning
silly uncle
growing grandson
sweet aunt
beauty of sunset after the rain
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“For all things sing to you, at times we just hear them more clearly.” –Rilke
Thursday’s I give thanks in this spot. Here I am seeing more clearly how God graces my life with a voice to sing His glory. There are others who raise their voices in thanksgiving as well. Check them out here…

Desert confessions

2011-08-02T06:00:00.000-05:00

Confession, in the past when difficult times have come – times of desert wanderings – I have been a grumbling complainer. I have been the children of Israel in the desert, “you have brought me to this desert to starve to death.” Of course, I didn’t phrase it that way. My words went, “Why is this happening to me” or “Why does this always happen this way to us.”

As the words spilled forth faith in God was lost, trust in His goodness was denied. The feelings that God was absent, unaware, uncaring took a place of prominence in my heart. The will to continue moving toward God did not exist. Instead I withdrew my heart and defaulted to the flesh.

The words have been written here before, this desert wandering is different. Times here are difficult. There is a list in my journal of things that weigh heavily on my heart. Some of these things are long-standing troubles. I see the dismal reality on the page and it saddens me. From the depths my heart is willing and anxious to have God’s manifest presence as close as possible.

Isn’t that what the desert journey was about for the Israelites? Moses taking them to the burning bush mountain to meet with God.

“When you have brought the people out of Egypt, you will worship God on this mountain.” Exodus 3:12

My heart cries, Yes, I will walk through this desert, trusting God, just to get to the mountain to worship Him.

Softly in my spirit, His Spirit replies, “Today you have reached the mountain.”

Face down on my knees with tears wetting the floor I weep. Weeping in agony for so much pain that continues…in ecstasy for the Lord has led me here…in gratitude for His presence…in joy…in worship that He has brought me to the place where the mountain trembles and trumpets sound…where smoke billows…and the Lord’s voice calls.

“God waits for us in the quiet wilderness of our hearts.”¹

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¹ Joseph Lumpkin, Dark Night of the Soul

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-07-31T06:00:00.000-05:00

"There is no one holy like the LORD; there is no one besides you; there is no Rock like our God.” 1 Samuel 2:2

Thankful Thursday

2011-07-28T06:00:00.000-05:00

The end of July has been a crazy ride. Putting the house back together, spending a week preparing for another school year, starting another school year have all left me wordless. My heart is grateful and full there is just no time to put the words down. So enjoy a few photos from Gold-hearted mom’s summer vacation – I know I have been enjoying them.

Water in the desert

2011-07-26T06:00:00.000-05:00

Only God’s provision, His deliverance, will satisfy my hungry, thirsty soul. God provides manna – bread – for life in the desert. He also furnishes water for my parched throat. God leads the children of Israel into the desert, they travel for three days without finding water. The water they did find was too bitter to drink. The Lord showed Moses a piece of wood which Moses threw into the water and the water became sweet.

Sometimes my life feels too bitter to swallow. The disappointments and hurts become overwhelming. I become desperately thirsty, God brings the wood to mind – the cross. At the foot of the cross I remember how Jesus body was bruised and his blood ran freely to purchase this wandering child. The water that flows is sweet because God is good and His love endures forever. Deeper into the desert God leads.

“O God, you are my God, earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you, in a dry and weary land where there is no water.” Psalm 63:1

So I seek the Lord by walking across the chapters of Exodus with the children of Israel. It wasn’t long before they were in need of water again. Where God led them to a place where there was no water for the children of Israel to drink. The people were ready to stone Moses, again God is faithful this time bringing water from the rock for His people.

Jesus said, “Whoever drinks the water I give him will never thirst…the water I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.” John 4:14

It is not far down the path when I am in need of water again. Needy and longing for more of Him to fill all of me. Moses struck the rock for the children of Israel, Jesus was struck for me bringing forth eternal water. Water that would quench my thirst and well up in me becoming a spring of life for others because of His Spirit at work in me.

“For I do not want you to be ignorant of the fact, brothers and sisters, that our ancestors were all under the cloud and that they all passed through the sea. They were all baptized into Moses in the cloud and in the sea. They all ate the same spiritual food and drank the same spiritual drink; for they drank from the spiritual rock that accompanied them, and that rock was Christ.” 1 Corinthians 10:1-4

Jesus is bread and water

the wood and the rock

provision in the desert

all hope, all trust

everything

placed on the One who

supplies and satisfies

the hungry and thirsty.

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This song has been playing through my head for days. Even though this desert is a place God has led me to, I find myself humming the chorus often.

Streams of Life by Ginny Owens

How many days, Lord, have I walked in this wilderness?
A thirsty pilgrim with no water to drink.
And this barren place is making me crazy,
But as I wander on, I am forced to think.
Seems like I have spent so much time searchin'
In a dry and weary land where there's no Truth.
But I think I'm finally realizin',
That my only hope of water is the well that comes from You, So-
Chorus:
Rain down Your love upon me
Pour out Your mercy on me
Please won't You take me to Your springs of life
'Cause I'm dying for deliverance, only You can save me,
I'm waitin', won't You take me,
To Your springs of life.
Oh God, You are my God,
And my spirit seeks You,
But my flesh has failed You time and time again.
And now I've chosen this desert when Your love was waitin',
But Your stubborn child longs to understand-
So I'll not waste another minute searchin'
In a dry and weary land where there's not truth,
Oh, I think I'm finally realizin'
That my only hope of water is the well that comes from You, So

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-07-24T06:00:00.000-05:00

Jesus said to them, “I tell you the truth, it is not Moses who has given you the bread from heaven, but it is my Father who gives you the true bread from heaven. For the bread of God is he who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world….

I am the bread of life. He who comes to me will never go hungry…” John 6:32-33, 35

Thankful Thursday

2011-07-21T06:00:00.000-05:00

Do you know your neighbors? Precious husband and I have been blessed through the years to have many good neighbors. Since the beginning of this house/farm project we have gotten to know our neighbors. These neighbors and not just good neighbors they are amazing neighbors.

This past week we were f.i.n.a.l.l.y able to get our house back in one piece. While Precious husband and sons were getting things ready at the log house the crane crew arrived. Sadly their tractor trailer became stuck in the curve leading up to the pasture where our house sits. One of our neighbors went to get his tractor and the other his bobcat. Together they pulled and pushed the truck out of the ditch on the right side of the road.

I stood on our back porch and wept because I knew they did it without Precious husband even knowing there was a problem. These two men took it upon themselves to lend a hand for their neighbor. At the end of a long day Precious husband and I lay in bed discussing the days events. We continue to be overwhelmed at the generosity of these two men.

At the beginning they allow us to move fence and widen the drive in order to get the house up the hill. Now they continually loan their time and equipment in order to help this family they barely know. I sit here now with tears in my eyes thinking of how often over the last 18-months these two men have given to us and asked for nothing in return.

Father – I am thankful our house is back in one piece and now we can start the work of renovating and readying the place to live. But Father, this week I am most thankful for these two men that you have brought along beside us for this part of the journey. I am overwhelmed at your provision and their generosity.

HOUSE BACK IN O.N.E. PIECE

Farmer B. using his tractor so often to help

Bobcat H. who has so generously used his bobcat

both men getting the truck unstuck

unnamed neighbor who cut our ditch this week

Precious husband’s kindness as I have been under the weather this week

Bobcat H.’s wife, D, who brought us cucumbers and cherry tomatoes from their garden

pastor at church we visited answering the phone and talking with me a few minutes

Precious husband fixing the dryer

part for dryer was only $20

Bread in the desert

2011-07-19T06:00:00.000-05:00

Down this desert path, along the way the Lord has led, things are not as barren and lifeless as they at first appeared. Stretching to the horizon at the beginning of this way the lay of the land looked dry, desolate, and dreary. Heading down the path into the desert there have been places of oasis between the dusty paths from one place to another.

The children of Israel left Egypt and entered the desert because God led them there. If they were looking toward the desert they would see the glory of the Lord. In the desert every morning God provided manna – bread – to meet their daily needs. Thinking about how God met their needs leads me back to poetry, a poem I penned several years ago and fits my wanderings for today.

Bread of Life

Dew, settling and gone,
Sunrise
“Thin flakes like frost on the desert floor”¹Manna, bread for today.
A morning long ago,
Sunrise
Thin flakes of flayed skin on the chilling soil
Manna, bread of life
Provision today and eternity
Sunrise

Every morning is a new beginning with Jesus, Bread of Life, given to supply fresh nourishment for the tasks of the day. I awaken with a hungry soul and a listening heart seeking the food for the day. The needed provision was settled long before I entered this desert. His Words are “sweet to my taste, sweeter than honey to my mouth!”² The taste lingers on my tongue providing sustenance throughout the day.

“and in the desert. There you saw how the Lord your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place.” Deuteronomy 1:31

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¹ Exodus 16:14

² Psalm 119:103

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-07-17T06:00:00.000-05:00

“Look to the Lord and His strength;

seek His face always.”

Psalm 105:4

Thankful Thursday

2011-07-14T06:00:00.000-05:00

It is after 10:00 pm when Precious husband and I take a turn up the hill to the pasture. It has been a long, full week on the farm. A week where Precious husband has actually been here working hard, not at the station. We took the kids out for a Mexican dinner and then to a creek to cool off. Now it is our turn to spend a few moments together.

We gaze at the stars and shining half moon that lights up the field. The crickets are singing their nightly lullaby rather loudly. I think out loud about how it will be when the house, sitting in two parts, is complete and we can sit on the porch and take in the view. He says, one day, knowing how much time and work there is still ahead. I tell him that there is no hurry, it will be done in God’s perfect timing (which is not necessarily mine – daily I am learning to trust).

I breathe deeply and sigh – content – thankful that God has brought us this far. I know the journey ahead will not be easy, but I chose to enjoy the process. I am relaxing into the future, knowing it is all in the hands of the one who alone is able to hold us then and now.

Father, today I am thankful for…

Your presence that walks with us on a path where we only see one step at a time

You know the plans you have for us, we can trust you

Boys to help waterproof the basement

Dad who teaches them how

Neighbor who brings a bobcat to backfill the basement

Neighbor who loans his truck to haul materials (our truck needs a transmission)

Neighbor who brings a tractor to mow the pasture

Neighbor whose granddaughter visits and gives Princess daughter a playmate for the week

Kids swimming in the creek

Kids flying Junebugs

Dad who teaches them how

Cool evening walks in the pasture with Precious husband

Afternoon thunderstorms bringing cooling rain

A few yellow squash and zucchini from the garden

Seedless watermelon

Scattered

2011-07-12T06:00:00.000-05:00

Gold-hearted mom travels out west while Helpful son ministers with youth in the inner city of Chicago. Since we have moved to the farm, Darling daughter and family are now an hour away. Challenge son seeks a job with a new place to live and Fun son prepares to attend school in a few weeks. Precious husband works long hours at the station and the farm while two youngest and I tend the garden and our flock of chickens.

My heart and my mind feel scattered. Since moving to the farm there are only three children under our roof. Two older boys stayed behind with Gold-hearted mom. Since 2008 our offspring have taken wing.

Darling daughter married, moved two states away, and has moved back. In 2010 Challenge son moved to the farm. Now we switch and he (temporarily) resides with Gold-hearted mom and Helpful son while five of us move to the farm. I will always be mom2six but the days of being surrounded by them all are gone.

The weeds in the garden grow quickly. On hands and knees I bend to pull them out. Seed scattered over a month ago is beginning to bloom and produce a few vegetables. I feel scattered with the changing times.

Our oldest three are seed that has been scattered, now is their time to plant, bloom, and produce a harvest. I must relax and trust that what has been planted will produce a Godly harvest – that they will tend their hearts well.

With our youngest three there is still planting and weeding to be done. Perhaps being scattered is not such a bad thing. The further the seed blows and drops the possibility of a greater harvest.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-07-10T06:00:00.000-05:00

“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God’s will.” Romans 8:26-27

Thankful Thursday

2011-07-07T06:00:00.000-05:00

I love it when God brings dear friends close. An amazing friend and her husband (~M~ & M) have moved back to the state and will be living not too far from the farm. This week I am also thinking and praying for other dear ones who God has granted me to know who live far away. What wonderful people the Father has brought into my life over the years. Some were just wandering through leaving their wisdom, others have become lifelong gifts to my heart even though we are separated by many miles.

Father, this week I am grateful for…

friends far and near

treasure of ~M~ & M

grandson giggles

completed chicken coop (there are still nesting boxes to add, along with sealing the wood, but the coop is now home to our flock of chickens)

dinner with Precious husband on the lake

country drives

grilled seafood

boats bouncing on the waves

thick chocolate milkshakes

late night walks in pasture with Precious husband & kids

Desert listening

2011-07-05T06:00:00.000-05:00

The Bible is open on the bed in front of me. I have been reading the Scriptures but the words just stay on the page. This is a path that has been traveled before. In the past when my spirit was empty and my soul dry anxiety would rise up. The desire for a quick path to “feeling” the Lord’s presence was strong.

This desert journey is different. Taking a path to Exodus I ponder further the desert wanderings of the children of Israel. They left Egypt on a high note – freedom from slavery with the Egyptians loading them with gold, silver, and clothing. But God knows they are not ready for battles ahead “so He led the people around by the desert road toward the Red Sea.”¹

With my spirit and soul feeling dry, May became a month to be consumed with prayer. Focusing on the Lord’s prayer and several books on prayer my heart is quiet before the Lord. Paul Miller’s book, A Praying Life,² is on the screen of my laptop.

Mr. Miller writes, “God takes everyone He loves through a desert.” God led them by a desert road.

May turns to June and the words for prayers still will not come and I find myself walking wooded trails listening. Listening to the birds as they sing and take wing through the trees. Listening to much needed rain as it falls on the metal roof of the farmhouse. Listening to trees creak as they bend in the wind. Listening to chickens cluck and squirrels chatter. Listening to horses snort and nicker. Listening to the nightly lullabies of crickets and frogs.

Miller writes, “Our responsibility is to cultivate a listening heart in the midst of the noise.” A slow smile spreads across my face, God’s silence through Scripture and worship has my spirit listening. Listening to His voice singing all around in creation.

This desert journey is different. I wonder what it would have been like if the children of Israel would have listened in the middle of the desert wanderings. If the eyes of the heart would have been opened through listening. When the road was dry and their throats were parched, when they were covered in dust from heat to toe, when they were hungry and tired, perhaps they should have continued to look…

“they looked toward the desert, and there was the glory of the Lord appearing in a cloud.” Exodus 16:10b

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¹Exodus 13:18

²Miller, Paul (2009). A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World (Kindle Location 3141). NavPress. Kindle Edition.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-07-03T06:00:00.000-05:00

“Let the name of the Lord be praised, both now and forevermore.

From the rising of the sun to the place where it sets, the name of the Lord is to be praised.”

Psalm 113:2-3

Thankful Thursday

2011-06-30T06:00:00.000-05:00

During the hot parts of the day we roam the woods of this property we are purchasing. Blackberry bushes are scattered everywhere. Bravely we reach past thorny leaves and stems to pick the ripe berries. On the inside label of the fruit pectin is a recipe for no-cook freezer jam. The fruit is mashed, measured, and mixed before being spooned into jars.

Most of the boys gather for a work day. It is time to get a chicken yard and coop made for these growing chickens. During a recent storm one of our chicken tractors was blown a bit releasing chickens to wander. These boys becoming men dig holes and stretch fencing to enclose an area by the garden. Bracing an old tree house they move it to the new chicken yard. The tree house will be recycled to become a chicken coop.

Days and weeks fill up with work. A few vegetables begin to bloom and grow. Anticipation for their tasty goodness also grows as we look forward to harvesting what we have been spending our days weeding and watering.

Daily the sun rises and sets and the Lord grants rain for watering our little garden. I take along a hammock and Bible to rest and cool down between weeding the garden rows. Lifting my eyes to the sky I am reminded that God is all grace and gives strong bodies to work and success to our plans. Exhaling slowly I breathe a prayer, Father, this week I am thankful for…

“You care for the land and water it; you enrich it abundantly. The streams of God are filled with water to provide the people with grain, for that is how you prepared the land.” Psalm 65:9

Your wisdom in preparing the land to grow such provision

Blackberry jam

Homegrown vegetable stir-fry

Safety of wandering chickens

Precious husband and boys working together

Strong, sweaty bodies

Chicken yard

Recycling something old into something useful

Time with girlfriends

Warrior women praying together

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Rolling up the tent flaps…

2011-06-28T06:00:00.000-05:00

Morning breaks softly over the hill behind the farmhouse, light streams in through the open window. Two youngest and I greet the morning and then the chickens. We move the tractors to fresh grass then take them feed and water. Back inside I prepare a cup of coffee and we pour three bowls of stale cereal after which we all shower and dress for service.

We are all in good spirits because we know we will worship with and see friendly faces this morning. Moving to a new place is challenging, finding a new place of worship, meeting new people. It is time to take a break and worship with those where there is a history of fellowship. So we drive a little over an hour to where we have worshipped pretty much the last 10 years.

After service the three youngest spend the afternoon with Precious husband while I am blessed to have lunch, visit, and pray with girlfriends. We have been praying together as a group now for over six years. These prayer warrior friends have watched my back seeking the Father through financial hardships, challenges with my children, and requests to keep my marriage strong. I have felt their caring and seen the answers to their prayers. There have been answers to prayers I have been privileged to pray on their behalf as well.

Late in the day children and I hug Precious husband and head home. A thunderstorm has blown by while we were all visiting. One of our chicken tractors has been blown around the yard and the chickens are roaming free. They quickly come to meet us as we get out of the vehicle. We reposition their mobile home and they willingly go in. The storm had our golden retriever girl so scared she broke a screen window to get in the house. Fun son fixes the screen and takes care of the scaredy-cat dog while Princess daughter and I walk up to the pasture to check the fence lines and horses as the sun is setting.

Sitting down on the bed the phone rings and it is another sweet friend calling to see how things are going. We chat pleasantly catching up from the last several weeks of not seeing each other at service. Hanging up the phone I tell Princess daughter, “This has been a great day.” Time well spent in worship and God’s Word, spending time visiting and praying with Godly friends, hugs from Precious husband, and even in the caring of stressed animals. The Spirit of God has been sweet from beginning to end of this day.

I think of the children of Israel as they were traveling in the desert. There were days where they traveled and life was busy with the tasks of packing and moving and setting up the tents again. Then there were those days when they were camping, situated around the Tabernacle, hearing and watching what they could of the priests carrying out their tasks so that atonement was made. Perhaps they spent those days enjoying the camaraderie that comes for shared experience, sitting with their tent flaps rolled up gazing on the presence of the Lord among them in the form of the Tabernacle.

The Father has given another oasis in the midst of the desert wanderings. The tent flaps of the soul have been rolled up in the presence of the Father and friends. Just as the rain over the last several days has watered the garden and caused the plants to shoot up, I feel refreshed, watered from a day soaking in God’s presence and the presence of His saints.

Thankful Thursday

2011-06-23T06:00:00.000-05:00

The washing machine would not drain, the dryer will not heat up to dry the clothes, and now the whole laundry room electricity is out. All this while Precious husband is working long hours at the fire station. Moving into a different house is fraught with learning the quirks.

I call Precious husband and he walks me through finding the correct breaker box and getting the laundry room electricity running again. The dryer still won’t dry but we can take a warm shower and hang clean clothes on the line. Adjustments are made to deal with the quirks.

As we adjust the hot weeks of summer scorch by. In the mornings we take care of chickens and weed the garden. Midday is spent in the woods searching for a cool place to hang a hammock and read a book. Late afternoon is time to water the garden and train the horse. The sun sets as Fun Sun puts away saddle and blanket.

Many more adjustments will be made to our new environment as we learn more about having a barnyard in our backyard and raising a few garden crops. The one thing that stays the same is the search for God’s blessings and my grateful heart.

Father – I am thankful for…

Darling daughter teaching how to trim goat hooves

Sensitive son learning to trim goat hooves

Two week old goat kids cuddling under my chin

Rain

Vegetables growing

Precious husband providing water for garden

Fun Son training horse

Horse growing more trusting and affectionate

Friends who invite two youngest to day camp for the week

Blackberries

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Thursday’s I give thanks in this spot on the web. Here I am seeing more clearly how God graces my life with a voice to sing His glory. There are others who raise their voices in thanksgiving as well. Check them out here…

A Neighbor, A Newspaper, and Prayer

2011-06-21T06:00:00.000-05:00

Our neighbor walks across the lawn this steamy summer afternoon and brings me the local newspaper. She opens to page two and points to an article entitled “Worth a few minutes of your time to read”. She invites me to enjoy the article when I have a few minutes and then encourages me to take plums from their tree which is loaded with the luscious fruit.

After she leaves I open the page and settle in front of a box fan to read the article which is a reprint of a speech given by a valedictorian from a school here in the county. It begins in the way most speeches do for high school graduations and then the young man gets to the heart of his speech based from the theme “Uncertain but Certain.” He understands our nation stands in the midst of uncertainty while encouraging his fellow students:

“… to look beyond the present towards reshaping our nation to what it can be and to what it once was…we can make a difference. … How, you might ask? Simply put: prayer. …God never changes; so if he provides internal and eternal stability, why not let him be the leader as you progress through life’s journey? Prayer provides a wonderful communication channel to God. He is the only benchmark and cornerstone for morality, as well as a consistent direction for leadership and an unwavering foundation. …The world is full of uncertainty; but God is steadfast. …”

Princess daughter goes out and plucks five juicy plums from the tree. I bite into the sweet juicy flesh. God’s loving call to prayer during the month of May echoes into June and I listen intently. The neighbor’s fruit tree bore abundant fruit last year and has again this year. Through my neighbor sharing the newspaper article God speaks, he answers my desire to hear His voice.

God is steadfast. I trust him to be the leader. Daily I read through passages in Psalms. Today Psalm 62 is part of the reading…

“Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge.” Psalm 62:8

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The link above, “Uncertain but Certain", will take you to the full speech. It is worth a few minutes of your time to read.

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-06-19T06:00:00.000-05:00

Thankful Thursday

2011-06-16T06:00:00.000-05:00

A friend, whose family Precious husband has known since elementary school, called and issued an invitation to her parent’s 50th wedding anniversary. They talked for a while and she asks if we would like to come out and spend the afternoon at the farm she and her husband are developing about an hour from our farm.

We load kids in the van and head over to their place. She brings BBQ and coleslaw and we sit in rocking chairs on their front porch. They have “hairy cows” (Scottish Highland breed) and we enjoy watching the calves chase each other. Our children play cards together and Princess daughter shows their youngest daughter how to chase and catch chickens. Most of us were not raised around farm animals and they still have a house in the city.

It is a relaxing afternoon and husband absorbs all the ideas her husband has used over the last three years of working their farm when he is not working his regular job. I think this encourages Precious husband as he is working at the fire station and the farm. Perhaps in three years our place will be as efficient as theirs. We will continue to enjoy their company and learn how those of us not raised on a farm can start a small family farm. A place to grow a garden, raise chickens, have a few goats, cows, and horses for our own personal use and pleasure.

Father - Rocking on her porch I think of how blessed we are to have known this family for so long. Thank you for their influence in our lives. Thank you for the time to visit their farm. I am also thankful for…

Rocking chairs

Friends Precious husband has brought into my life

A park play date and the possibility of new friends

Summer swimming after Vacation Bible School

Water slides

Craft day with Gold-hearted mom and Darling daughter

Sewing machine given to Darling daughter

Playing with Little One

Children playing new games

Art attempts (Princess daughter calls attempt an animated version of Little One)

Fun son capturing and riding our wild little pony

Precious husband hauling water for garden

Neighbor’s thoughtful sharing newspaper and

Tasty plums

Helpful son and his church boys group safety during Appalachian Trail hike

Cool shower after working in garden

Small evening rain shower (Father, we could use more, thank you)

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Scripture Only Sunday

2011-06-12T06:00:00.000-05:00

O Lord, our Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! Psalm 8:1

Thankful Thursday

2011-06-09T06:00:00.001-05:00

Precious husband calls them useless animals even though we all think they are beautiful. They have been left to roam the farm for the last year since we have lived too far to consistently work with them. Now that we are here on a daily basis they are getting regular workouts. I usually get a small lump of fear in my throat as they are such large animals – I am working on that fear thing.

We are learning about living a simplified life one step at a time. When we moved to the farm we gave up the cable TV and instant internet service. The little farmhouse has no central heating or air conditioning so we are making use of shade trees and box fans. We have planted a garden for the third year and I am hoping for a better harvest this year. Our chickens are getting large and it is almost time to cull the flock and put a few in the freezer – too many roosters. Butchering our first chicken should be a “fun” learning experience.

In all these things I find myself moving a little more slowly. Along the desert paths and with the slowing down comes a heart enlarged with gratitude…

Father God – In this moment I am thankful for…

cool evenings to work horses
overcoming fears
less
wild blackberries and flowers
towering shade trees
wrought iron table situated under trees
windows open
fan stirring breeze across sheets
Vacation Bible Schools – those who minister to our children
finishing report cards for the year
sun tea
ice cold water

Precious husband taking us to…
a place to swim
sweet Lady chasing sticks in the water
waterfalls
a phone call to Precious husband from a life-long friend, a time to rejoice
seasonal salad – spinach, strawberries, feta cheese and Greek vinaigrette
help hauling water from creek to garden
camera to capture all the blessings God gives

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“For all things sing to you, at times we just hear them more clearly.” –Rilke

Desert Worship

2011-06-07T06:00:00.000-05:00

I had stared at the Facebook icon for weeks, May – Month of Prayer. I desire to grow in the area of prayer, but for some reason anxiety about pursuing the subject rises in my throat. Perhaps the disappointment over unanswered prayers or answers that were the opposite to what I prayed is what had me tiptoeing around a monthly focus on prayer. The hesitation is what finally convinced me that perhaps this was the very subject needed for study.

At the library, Prayer: Does It Make Any Difference? by Phillip Yancey is checked out along with Drawing Near by John Bevere. An online friend recommends A Praying Life: Connecting with God in a Distracting World by Paul Miller. Psalm 107 and the Lord’s Prayer become Scriptures that lead. Slowly I have been seeking, striving to grow in this area.

Yet I have felt empty, a soul wandering in a desert of quiet. Silence has become a cloud between heaven and my heart. The summer heat has matched my desert wanderings – hot. Lethargy creeps and the energy to pray is nowhere to be found. Amazingly in the oasis of Psalm 107 the words, “He led them” keep a repeating refrain.

I wonder how the children of Israel dealt with the heat of the desert as the Lord led them? The image of the cloud that covered the tent of meeting and signaled when they should move and when they should camp keeps coming to mind. How did the Israelites handle the days, weeks, months when the Lord stopped in one hot, dusty place?

Turning to Exodus 33:10 I read…

“Whenever the people saw the pillar of cloud standing at the entrance to the tent, they all stood and worshipped, each at the entrance to his tent.”

I’ve been wandering in the desert this past month focusing on prayer, seeking the consuming cloud of a fiery God. The Israelites wandered in the desert with the visible presence of a this burning God.

I read from Yancey’s book:

“I have learned to see prayer not as my way of establishing God’s presence, rather as my way of responding to God’s presence that is a fact whether or not I can detect it.”

God’s presence is all around me I simply need to respond. I read in Yancey’s book about a man that had been married 65 years. He compares his marriage relationship with the relationship he has with Father God.

“Romance starts as a blazing bonfire…after a few decades it settles…like a heap of glowing coals…coals are good…you can roast marshmallows or warm your feet. A different kind of companionship opens up. ..in prayer…most of the time I persist because I value the relationship with God, just as I value my marriage. I gratefully warm my feet by the fire.”

The heat continues to rise and I yield in faith waiting on the cloud to move. I respond like the children of Israel when they see the cloud for my stop at the oasis of Psalm 107 has led me into Psalm 108:1. I will stand here and worship until the cloud of His presence moves to the next place of worship.

“My heart is steadfast, O God;

I will sing and make music with all my soul.”

Scripture Only Sunday

2011-06-05T06:00:00.000-05:00

“Let them give thanks to the LORD for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for men.” Psalm 107:31